I have 3 young children with my wife whom I have been with for 10 years. I have a good paying job and we have purchased a house together 3 years ago. Things have always had their ups and downs, but nothing terrible.

Today she tells me she is taking the kids and moving to another state. She says some time apart would be good for us. She is planning on staying indefinitely in one room of a friends house that she hasn’t seen in years. She has no money of her own, hasn’t worked steadily for a while.

She says she wants me to follow behind some months later once things have gotten better for her. She has made it clear that she is going, even though I object. She is pulling eldest child out of school to do it.

She says we are not separating or getting a divorce, but my objections and rationality mean nothing to her plans.

What should I do? Should I keep my steady income, continue paying for a house all the while she will be draining all surplus funds to stay a float while running away? Should I try to follow and find a job there? There, is very rural and has limited job prospects and I will most certainly have to take less pay. Is what she is doing even legal without my consent?

While my job is good paying, it is high stress and I do not enjoy it. I would also enjoy living in the same area that she is headed toward as it is beautiful and has many extra curricular activities that are not available here.

I guess it comes down to good paying job with stability and house, but family living else where.. or close to family, but in potential poverty with no housing. Or am I missing another option??