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[–]deepspace742 points43 points44 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I believe buddhist monks are living the highest path of Mgtow, where they shed all desires from sexual, emotional, and material.
[–]Trollileo12332 points33 points34 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
They learn how not to be distracted. We in the west learn the opposite, our life is supposed to be about commiting to something like family, wife, or state. In other words, we learn how to BE distracted from what we truly want, which is peace.
Peace and quiet.
[–]BrizzLatency15 points16 points17 points 6 years ago (31 children) | Copy Link
Any recommendations on how to rid your mind of the "turbulence"?
[–]ParalyticPoison9 points10 points11 points 6 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
My personal advice is, record events in your day to day life that while they may seem insignificant, can actually be good ways to gauge your mental state on those days. Once you get enough of this data over many weeks and months, you might actually notice patterns, once you start to see these you can actually start making small changing in various variables and see what changes make you mind more turbulent, and some that make things less turbulent.
After starting to record things in a spread-sheet on a consistent basis and noticing small things and taking note of them, I have found that I have a much better idea of what sort of things throw me off during my days, and what things (or lack of things) actually make me feel more calm and see things more clearly, etc.
Of course, being flawed creatures that we are, every day can throw more unknowns into the mix, such as our ever changing emotions and such, so those can have an effect on your data, but you can even start to see patterns in that as well and predict what things make you better, and what things make you worse and try to remove those things as much as possible.
[–]TheLastMgtow1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Nice bro. Could you give us some examples. For example, what are those things that give you peace, or what things you need to feel good? And how did you notice them.
In my case its physical exercise, proper diet, and being away from any toxic stuff and toxic people. Which means nowadays im at my best when im mostly alone. Avoiding watching the news is also good.
Is this what you meant? Or am i missing something?
[–]ParalyticPoison1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
That's basically what I mean, yes. I would definitely say that i'm on that spectrum as well, where I get a lot more accomplished, feel more at ease, and am generally just more relaxed and happy when I am alone, or at least have a fair amount of privacy.
I'm sure I would be better off in my current situation in terms of productivity if I lived alone, but the lessened financial stress I think out-weighs that a fair amount for the time being. So i'm able to make somewhat strategic decisions with the information I have gathered, I can make better informed decisions on how I think I will react to changes in my environment with what I have learned about myself.
I've especially learned a lot of useful data when I started fasting and keeping close track of what I eat, when I eat, how often I eat, and how much of what I eat. For example, I now realize that I could have been much more awake and not feeling shitty and tired at work if I never ate during my shift, because I would always get tired a few hours after eating due to insulin spiking and work would be a slog for most of the shift afterward, which would overall increase my stress because I would always feel tired at work.
Taking my weight at the same time every day when I wake up gives me a better idea of if i'm eating too much or too little during my short eating window on most days, so i'm almost completely in control of my body weight now from knowing this information and keeping track of it. I also no longer get indigestion and stomach pain because I kept track of what foods triggered this response in me, or what times and what amounts would cause it. I almost never get headaches anymore for similar reasons.
Really the main thing I need to work on now is being able to get myself away from distractions such as Reddit and Youtube and others sites so I can focus on my more productive skill building work, but learning programming can be extremely taxing, will-power draining as you need to force your focus at times, and it can be boring. Also, I need to work out better what causes me to have trouble sleeping, which as another example I am seeing somewhat of a pattern already, where if I stay up until I start feeling exhausted it's a lot easier to get to sleep, where if I try to force sleep by going to bed at a "better" time I just lay around and can't fall asleep until about the time I would have got exhausted anyway.
Hopefully these examples are enough to show how powerful this method can be for self-improvement and just general understanding of your body and how to take advantage of certain things you might never have noticed have a bigger effect on you may have expected.
[–]TheLastMgtow1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
For example, I now realize that I could have been much more awake and not feeling shitty and tired at work if I never ate during my shift
Sounds like what people that have blood sugar issues describe. Have you tried a ketogenic diet? Replaces carbohydrates with healthy fats, steady source of energy, no blood spikes, no sugar crash.
I also no longer get indigestion and stomach pain because I kept track of what foods triggered this response in me, or what times and what amounts would cause it. I almost never get headaches anymore for similar reasons.
I did exactly the same. A lot of people is doing this nowadays. It seems something changed in the food supply so drastically, that we are not adapted and are suffering with it. I react to at least half of the foods you can buy in the supermarket. Even meats i react if they are not grassfed.
Really the main thing I need to work on now is being able to get myself away from distractions such as Reddit and Youtube
Although they are distractions the ammount of info and stuff your learn on these platforms are unprecedented.
You can however abstain from it. There are for sure benefits in doing that. But you must replace it with something else. Like going for some hiking, or doing some sport, otherwise if you stay at home you will be just looking at the ceiling.
learning programming can be extremely taxing
It is. And you burn out fast. I notice sometimes i cant think anymore, and find any solution, i really need to go to sleep, and sometimes when i wake up i have the solution in my mind. Funny. If you burn out, then it takes weeks, to be able to learn again, and do again the stuff you need to do.
I need to work out better what causes me to have trouble sleeping
I would put my bets on the diet. On the carbs, and the lack of saturated fat. Ketogenic diet, with moderate protein.
I just lay around and can't fall asleep until about the time I would have got exhausted anyway.
Sounds exactly like what i use to have before i did ketogenic diets. You have too much energy. Sugar does that. Work out and try keto or carnivore diet (they both are different).
Thanks man. Good luck.
[–]ParalyticPoison0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Yeah, I did the Keto diet when I first got into tracking my food and diet, it definitely helped. After a few weeks of that though, I found out about the "Snake Diet" which involved similar principles but involved using fasting to control weight, insulin response, and general body inflammation. Once I got down to my current weight and started to maintain with 23-1 fasting-eating windows, one meal a day, i'm at my current position. I'm trying to keep my diet cheap and low maintenance, so i'm still eating some unhealthy carbs, it does increase my lifting ability though on my workout days. When I was pure low-carb keto my workouts were terrible due to having no glycogen stores on my muscles for quick energy.
Really though, the big game changer for my intestinal problems and semi-frequent headaches was the fasting, just having body inflammation as low as possible keeps these things from occurring. Keto also has similar results, but just eating less frequently significantly improved my results. I also forgot to mention that I had lower back pain before going on the Keto and Fasting diet, and the pain has not returned since, not sure if it's due to losing 42 pounds, or from reduced inflammation, probably both.
It's sad that people are still so ignorant about what is actually a good diet today. Plenty of MGTOW channels have talked about Keto, like Sandman and TFM follow it, which is awesome, but I wish more people would look into the Snake Diet, the results are honestly mind-blowing, but people still need to get over that brain-washing that you will die if you don't eat for extended periods of time, which is bullshit. My longest personal DRY fast was 121 hours when I still had a good amount of body fat. Now that i'm pretty lean though, I can't go that long without fucking my sleep pretty badly.
[–]TheLastMgtow1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
. Plenty of MGTOW channels have talked about Keto, like Sandman and TFM follow it
Sandman has the same problem as you and me. He reacts to most foods too. Make no mistake, most people at this point are having issues, but most cant even begin to understand they originate from food, and most even if they knew, they would not have the strenght to go through all these experiments and abstain from all the harmful stuff. Its really not easy.
[–]BrizzLatency0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Holy shit this is a genius idea how do you propose I record myself at work?
[–]ParalyticPoison3 points4 points5 points 6 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link
When I say "record" I don't really mean recording audio or video, I basically mean keeping a diary of some sort, a log. Maybe not as verbose as a diary, but stuff like, "felt very anxious today" or "I felt unusually relaxed today", and keep all of this dated and saved to something like a Google-sheets spread-sheet or just an Excel spread-sheet, even just in a .txt doc in notepad, etc. You could obviously use something like a calendar or a physical note-pad, but I find having the digital version is much more organized and you can use the search function to search through.
Once you have these things noted down for a long enough data-set, you can actually make a few conclusions on some patterns you see. Like maybe on days that you feel anxious, you noticed at some point in the day you had some amount of caffeine or ate some sugary thing. Or maybe you got in a small argument over somebody cutting you off or something, or your boss was being a dick-head or something.
For example, I have noticed that on days I am very fidgety and anxious, I bite my nails a lot and can't focus on very much, but if I workout for like 20 minutes and take a cold shower after, i'm much more relaxed. If I get about 20 minutes of warm sun on my skin, I seem to feel more relaxed on those days than on others. This is not 100% scientific or anything, since the data-set is fairly small, and I don't record the same things every day, but I try to be as detailed and consistent as I possibly can within reason.
Also on the note of keeping a "log-book" of things, if you notice that you worry about forgetting things often, or you have ideas that pop up and you worry about forgetting them (you will if given enough time). Just have a separate document for those as well, write down any ideas that pop into your head that you feel are worth remembering, this way you can never really forget them, and even more importantly, you will take the burden off your mind, basically freeing up the RAM cache in your head so more stuff can be processed with less stress during your day. I used to not write my ideas down, and I would always forget them, and get stressed trying to keep them in my memory throughout the day, it was stupid, just write what is on your mind down and it lifts 10-tons of unnecessary burden off your mind.
[–]BrizzLatency1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Thank you so much for a detailed response I may start to incorporate something like this here in the future for my sake. I feel like with this method of writing things down and noticing patterns I can easily start to change my terrible habits and start pointing out things I dont like about myself that I can change rather than what i cant momentarily this will most likely make me happier the more i think about the logic behind your method I really appreciate this!
Also I do write down things in a to do list on my phone and everything and I gotta say it does make things 100 times easier than trying to remember every little thing I want to get completed.
I even have an idea section just in case and It really works!
[–]ParalyticPoison1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Good to hear, just like physical clutter in our work or living spaces, mental clutter is just as, if not more, detrimental for your effectiveness in getting stuff done. Just because you can't physically see your thoughts, does not mean these thoughts and ideas don't need to be organized and cleaned up to make sense instead of just mental white noise.
[–]BrizzLatency1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Damn I'm very interested in actually understanding my own mind I should probably get on this asap to further help me grow
[–]sir_shitfuck4 points5 points6 points 6 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
Learn to pay no attention to the content of mind. The content of mind is not reality, because you are not mind.
It means simply to let the feeling be there and to focus on letting out the energy behind it. The first step is to allow yourself to have the feeling without resisting it, venting it, fearing it, condemning it, or moralizing about it. It means to drop judgment and to see that it is just a feeling.
So just feel the feeling without doing anything about it? Actually makes sense I just want to know if I'm understanding this correctly
[–]sir_shitfuck1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link
Yes because thoughts come and go, they are impermanent (like women lol).
So do not breed attachment. You can't just understand this conceptually, you develop a deeper concrete understanding of this through mindfulness practices and meditation (actual meditation, not redpill meme meditation where their goal is to be present brah so I can bang more thots - which breeds deep attachment to sensual desire).
The state of bliss achieved through meditation is indescribable. Sex feels extremely mundane and cheap in comparison.
Sex feels good because it allows us into a temporary non-dual state (as far as my understanding) in the physical. Deeper levels of meditation transcend all that.
[–]BrizzLatency0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Gotcha I appreciate the response man do you have any sort of advice for meditation and developing mindfulness through it I would love to have a better understanding of how to achieve mindfulness if you dont mind lol.
Sex is awesome and it feels very good but you are right it is only a temporary bliss.
[–]sir_shitfuck0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
The two best, most direct, no-fluff teachers are Adyashanti and Dr David R Hawkins, just search through their materials in terms of books and videos and you'll be on your way.
If you wanted a guide to meditation, you could read something like The Mind Illuminated, but as you'll see if you listen to those teachers you'll recognize that people get into the habit of segregating their spiritual work (time slot for meditation etc), when in fact your whole life is your spiritual work.
[–]BrizzLatency0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
ok so mindfulness is something that should be practiced consistently instead of a certain time increment and it will overall help your mental stability, nice! i like it and i will watch some of their videos and look up their books! Thank you for the information!
I agree with this, the only emotions I suppress though are the ones that can get you into bad situations out in public places, such as anger and such. The main emotion I have learned to not hold back is ones that make you want to cry pretty much, I at least don't suppress it in private anymore like I used to, I just let it flow until it subsides, and it usually feels pretty good to do so in the end.
[–]sir_shitfuck1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Nice. The whole idea is to distance yourself from these emotions and understand they are not "you". They are like the clouds, they come and go, they are impermanent. It's a very stoic philosophy.
At a deeper level, you are not your thoughts either. A stepping stone to greater awareness is to understand that you are the space in which thoughts arise, not the thoughts themselves. Our whole lives we have been entranced by our thoughts thus we have never really seen reality clearly only in those rare moments.
How can our thoughts be reality if they are transitory like emotions?
If you are able to do what needs to be done no matter your emotions, then you are far ahead of the vast majority of the population.
Emotions come up, but it's up to you to decide what to do with them. I recommend "Letting go" by Dr David R Hawkins, a fantastic book that will blow your mind.
[–]OnlyHanzo2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Meditation really works.
Concentrate on your mind, close off all distractions and just focus.
Gotcha is there any videos or books you reccomend to reach something like this?
[–]OnlyHanzo1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I havent thought about teaching someone, but generally reading more good books helps build your inner monologue. Videos - not so much.
A useful thought to start is "im not in a rush to do anything, nothing will change if i take some time for myself". Cut a salad really slowly with precision. Put a show on pause and think for a minute. Just look at yourself in the mirror, study your details. Meditation can be done in many places and activities, not just in a temple with incense and buddha statues.
Thank you so much for taking the time to help me in my pursuit of mindfulness good sir!
[+][deleted] 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
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Gotcha thank you man
[–]lonewolfsigmamgtow1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Do visit isha yoga center if you are in USA or visit their website. It has helped me alot in my days if depression.
Thank you I'll look into it!
Lol maybe if I live somewhere where it's legal I'll take ya up on that for now I'll stick to cbd
[–]andreas-mgtow0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Look at the picture closely... post nut clarity.
Lmao truuu
[–]kurtu53 points4 points5 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Be careful. There are also Buddhists who advocate for the muddy eye as well. To often a person is straining to achieve the crystal clear vision and this brings suffering.
To be content with the muddy vision, that can alleviate it.
[–]daniel133243 points4 points5 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Don’t forget that everything becomes clearer post-nut. When in doubt, rub one out lmao.
[–]IkemenKyoushi234 points5 points6 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
"Be like water, my friend" - Bruce Lee
[–]xXRazzRXx2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Water is wet
[–]Sumfuc1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
“Only the BBQ will not betray you”
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The five hindrance obstuct the path to our right concentration or stillness of the mind. So it is good to identify these as we meditate and be mindful when they come to our mind. In Sangarava sutta (SN 46.55) Buddha give 5 beautiful similes to illustrate the mind obstructed by the five hindrances. The mind when covered with the five hinderances is like clear a bowl of water (still mind) with different contaminants or situations.
1. Sensory desire kāmarāga: - Imagine a bowl of water mixed with lac, turmeric, dark green or crimson dye. If a man with good eyesight were to look at the reflection of his own face in it, he would not know or see it as it really was.
2. Ill will -vyāpāda - Imagine a bowl of water, heated on a fire, boiling up and bubbling over. If a man with good eyesight were to look at the reflection of his own face in it, he would not know or see it as it really was
3. Sloth and torpor - thīnamiddhā - Imagine a bowl of water covered over with slimy moss and water-plants. If a man with good eyesight were to look at the reflection of his own face in it, he would not know or see it as it really was
4. Restlessness and remorse - uddhaccakukkucca - Imagine a bowl of water ruffled by the wind, so that the water trembled, eddied and rippled. If a man with good eyesight were to look at the reflection of his own face in it, he would not know or see it as it really was.
5. Doubt - vicikicchā - Imagine a bowl of water, agitated, stirred up muddied, put in a dark place. If a man with good eyesight were to look at the reflection of his own face in it, he would not know or see it as it really was.
SN 46.55
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