I've realized and now highly suspect my fair half is borderline. She frequently splits between seeing me as the greatest person in the world or as the biggest asshole ever. Her generally impulsive behavior and history of emotional abuse during childhood and adolescence (thanks to her mother) have cemented the idea of her having BPD in my head.

I've done some dread and have hit the gym harder -- seems to be making it worse. I know that fear of abandonment is powerful with BPD so I don't know if I can turn the dread up that high without her going ballistic.

I know here in MRP we have chosen Hard Mode, and the few of us that have married a woman with BPD have chosen Heroic Mode. Those that have married BPD or have exp with it - any tips?