Getting Advice While Self Representing - The Experience I Just Had

notevenapro · 2018-02-28T10:00:34+00:00

There are certain things in life that you do not attempt unless you are trained to do so. I could make a list a mile long. Being your own lawyer or doctor might top that list.

Talon235 · 2018-02-28T11:01:12+00:00

You... should get a lawyer

Karissa36 · 2018-02-28T05:24:12+00:00

The problem here is that what you wanted is kind of like calling a doctor on the phone and asking him to give you tips on how to remove your own appendix. Sure, it would be cheaper but no doctor is going to do that.

perplexedm · 2018-02-28T11:51:31+00:00

If you are knowledgeable and adept than an expert lawyer, your call.

lmicro70 · 2018-02-28T11:04:32+00:00

C'mon now... Comparing a surgeon with a Lawyer is a very far reach...

Don't listen to these previous comments... they are probably attorneys... Use avvo.com for your questions.

My ex-wife spent about $200k to my $70k before I self represented. For the mathematically impaired, that's $270k making some fat attorneys fatter... I've come to a conclusion that divorce court for men is actually a transfer of wealth to the already rich attorneys or the evil creatures that were once known as wonderful wives. Unfortunately for most men it is a losing battle. I am a direct witness to the abuse that men get in family court by judges with or without attorneys. It is an undeniable truth that in most cases men get the short end of the stick in this system. I can understand why some men walk away from their children and avoid the fight. If you can't prepare to become your ex's and the courts punching bag, going to family court is not for you. This court system will make the relationship between you and your ex worse because it is a combative system of winner and loser.

As for the lawyers, I saw these bumbling idiots called attorneys that represented me. They couldn't and didn't want to keep up with my ex's $420 an hour attorney that ran circles around them. I realized I could do the same work they did but better and at a minimal costs. Shortly thereafter I was running circles around my ex's attorney. I'd go into court and watch as my ex spent $3000 for her attorney to sit around waiting to be heard for the 15 minute hearing. I'd walk out $15 in the hole because I paid for a hamburger and parking. It can be fun and empowering to turn the noose on the other end, especially when you are dealing with a difficult ex and attorney on the other end and, I believe that if you play your cards right, the outcome will likely be the same represented or unrepresented.

Family law is the loosest law of the land. Judges are granted discretion on most matters. The best thing to do is hire an attorney that practices family law by the hour. One that will answer your questions, provide you with boiler template documents that you can work with. Some attorneys will do limited scope representation. That means if you don't feel confident going into court for a certain hearing, they can come in and temporarily become your attorney of record in order to represent you for that specific matter. Many of them will not want to help you "part time" because they want full control of your case and your life savings. Just keep shopping around until you find one that will.

Pretend to be a lawyer yourself throughout this process. Do all your research with the guidance of an hourly attorney. Hire a paralegal to help you with your paperwork. Go to your local law library and ask the front desk to show you where all the family law code books can be found and start browsing through them for the issues you might face. Go into court with suit and tie and brief case, well prepared with your personal copies of documents. Many judges will make their decision just by reading the pleading and responses, so oral argument may not be necessary, but be prepared with an outline of what you want to say in court. Think of what opposing counsel is going to say about you and think of rebuttals in advance.

If you're nervous expressing yourself, join a public speaking club like Toastmasters which will help build your confidence.

In family court Judges are very familiar to the fact that many people are self represented or "in pro-per". The biggest hurdle is the rampant bias and preferential treatment Judges give to attorneys. Human nature dictates this and no Judge is immune to it since he is a lawyer himself. They will talk mostly to the other parties attorney during your hearing. Expect that. The best thing you can do is make your pleadings and responses brief but thorough, covering everything you want to say and hope that the judge actually reads it.

The bar association has a monopoly on all this stuff. That's why you pay so much. Who do you think is the biggest opponent of shared parenting nationwide? The bar association... Shared parenting would take much of the conflict away resulting in a curb of expenses relating this multi-billion dollar industry that leaves most visitors broke and beaten under the guise of the so called "best interests".

Title	Getting Advice While Self Representing - The Experience I Just Had
Author	sayshey
Upvotes	0
Comments	18
Date	February 28, 2018 3:32 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/80sw5c/getting_advice_while_self_representing_the/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/getting-advice-while-self-representing-the.905232 https://theredarchive.com/post/905232

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