I'm genuinely scared.

DavidByron2 · 2018-10-18T17:53:08+00:00

People will feel this is extreme. But if it is legal in your state (“one party consent”), record at all times any social encounter you have with both men and women. And document your recordings. If you have an android phone, you can download an app that records in m4a or .3gp which are really compressed files that have good audio quality. 64 GB can record for weeeks.

I have this app: Easy voice recorder and set the voice quality to .3gp which literally gives me 16,000 hours of recording space on a 64 gb micro SD card. M4a (higher quality) gives me 1600 hours (which is plenty—you get a new micro SD card when you run out of space every 6 months potentially)

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.coffeebeanventures.easyvoicerecorder

If you don’t want to do that, fine. But it helps in feeling safe and empowered. If anyone makes the claim, you can tear them up with that objective evidence and you may have power over them for falsely accusing you.

Most people believe false accusations are “rare”, but we don’t know how rare they are. Studies base that statistic on “verified false accustions”...but not all false accusations are verifiable, some people convicted could be falsely accused. Many civil rape allegation cases go unsolved and nothing happened: so what happened here: was someone falsely accused or did a rape actually occur. And how can we know?

I refuse to have “faith” that most accusations are true. Faith is not an evidence based approach. And it’s terrible that people have it. That’s not how science works, that’s how pseudo-intellectual, faith apologist, anti-science, anti-empiricists work.

DavidByron2 · 2018-10-18T18:03:11+00:00

It's a bit like recently freed slaves and white people in the South used to be 100 years ago or more. You look at the wrong white person the wrong way and they can just up and decide to fuck with you because they can. That doesn't mean all white people were racist assholes, but it does mean you need to figure out which are and which aren't and be careful around ones you don't know. Don't stare at them because that could be taken as disrespect, but then again avoiding eye contact altogether could be too. Be deferential, apologize a lot if necessary, avoid saying much, maybe act a little stupid if it helps.

You get the idea right?

Do not get angry or uppity. Don't be opinionated. Don't piss them off or give them cause.

Or it's like how you have to be with cops I guess. Just assume they're a homicidal lunatic right on the edge of going off on you until you know they aren't.

In short act like you were a second class citizen because you are. And don't let it eat away at you. Millions of other people in history have had this as a normal part of their lives and have learned to cope. And you will too.

imbecile · 2018-10-18T18:05:58+00:00

Don't be scared. This irrational fear of the opposite sex is responsible for most of the bullshit coming from the feminist camp.

Just be aware and minimize your exposure. And beyond a certain point it is out of your control, so worrying too much is pointless.

PointlessCarnal2018 · 2018-10-18T19:26:13+00:00

Dont touch anyone or provide the opportunity

genkernels · 2018-10-18T20:09:54+00:00

I feel if a female that I know hates me to such a degree for any reason could use that against me. Yeah sure, it could be done cause it'll be an accusation, but it'll stick with me for life. People will see me and ostracise me even if it's not true.

So, there are many sorts of situations that people live in and have lived in where if someone gets sufficiently pissed off at you you could be badly beaten up, and that could affect your job. Normally the law tries as much as possible to prevent that from happening, but there have been many places and many times in history where the law isn't as functional as it is now. This is not a new type of phenomenon.

The same sort of precautions apply to deficiencies in the law in such situations as it does specifically with false rape allegations. Try to have as few enemies as possible, insulate yourself with friendly witnesses (no one is expecting a credible Pence allegation anytime soon), and try as much as possible not to be broke in case you need to afford working through the justice system. Don't fuck with people (in this case, take that as literally as you like), and if you want to be prepared, start recording when things look like they might get out of hand.

False allegations, while not as rare as some think, are rare. Additionally, it is likely that most allegations don't result in any sort of "ruin your life" result, some leaving their victims essentially unscathed (such as Paikin). Keep your anxiety rational.

2018-10-19T04:30:47+00:00

It’s a legitimate fear, I get it. I know a lot of people who have been falsely accuse of harassment/assault. Years ago I was jumped and savagely beaten at work after a girl I turneddown lied to her BF and told him I spit in her face (complete lie, I honestly didn’t even realize she was upset with me).

dmfreelance · 2018-10-28T04:43:29+00:00

along the journey you will find some few amazing women who understand that men suffer, women who understand that the patriarchy is bullshit, women who understand that life isn't perfect for men.

When you find such a woman, keep her around.

antilopes · 2018-10-19T04:28:44+00:00

You could try to work out why you are so obsessed with this particular danger.

Getting killed in a car crash can affect your whole life badly too. So can suicide. Or getting raped by a man. Or partial versions of any of these.

I worked out you are 15x more likely to be falsely accused than you are to be hit by lightning, assuming a 10% false accusation of a named individual rate and (USA) 500 hits per year and 90k police reports.

Of the three things above getting raped by a man is a bit more likely than being falsely accused, using the UK crime survey statistics and defining rape as penetration of you by a man.

The other two I didn't calculate but I imagine they are a great deal more likely. How much time do you spend thinking about how to minimise your risk when travelling in a car? How much do you disrupt your life to keep yourself safe? Avoiding lifts from drunk people won't save you, most people already do that. So what will you do, stay home?

You can record yourself and get your cellphone tracking history saved and have home recording, realistically. People have saved themselves with all 3 of those. But you really should talk to a therapist because they are experts in how to manage anxiety. I'm not but I know OCD sufferers report that buying into the obsession is harmful, tends to make it worse.

Title	I'm genuinely scared.
Author	D3adAlr3ady
Upvotes	28
Comments	13
Date	October 18, 2018 5:31 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/9pbee0/im_genuinely_scared/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/im-genuinely-scared.891659 https://theredarchive.com/post/891659

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