“Your faith was not enough.” —- who would say that to a decent, bereaving father, putting the blame on him for not having enough faith to pray his child’s healing? In the end, he took his own life. (Real story)

Similarly, we have “tough and fearless” people blurting out similar statements to decent people (people who are not bullies) like… “You are not resilient enough.” “You are not exercising your willpower/free will enough.” “You are not making a choice/decision enough.” “You are not ‘relying on Jesus’ strength’ enough.” “You are not ‘resting in Jesus’ enough.” “You are not willing to come out of your comfort zone enough.” “You are not ignoring foolish opinions of others enough.”

And this is how it goes — toxic resilience, toxic willpowerism and toxic masculinity will always tell you that your “resilience”, “willpower” or “faith” is never good enough. They do not see how their OWN will is weaker than a paper knife yet busy preaching to decent people “you have a will. You have a choice.”

So this is the widespread worship of “will” and “resilience” by all walks of faith and atheism —- but causing the decent sufferer of vulnerable emotions to experience more wrong guilt, condemnation, helplessness, fragility and God forbid, suicide.