What's the benefit?

Apparently confidence is THE big thing that most people who lean into traditional dating advice claim is going to get you success in dating above all else.

Yet a lot of female posters here claim their partner is attractive or that their "type" is their partner....who they find physically attractive....

How many of you would admit your partner is NOT that physically attractive to you, and that confidence is what drew you to them...and HOW did that confidence benefit you significantly over being with a guy with normal esteem (not unconfident, just chill and normal) who turned your head in the street?