Regret

VasiliyZaitzev · 2026-07-06T23:08:50+00:00

So I’m a Rule 9 violation, and the ladies here will be able to help you more specifically, but I promise you a man will be able to love you.

Don’t torture yourself. You had sex. That’s it. Don’t act like you murdered somebody because you didn’t. Everything will be OK. You move forward by pulling your Big Girl Panties (back) on and moving forward. It’s not that difficult. I would be surprised if 5% of women are virgins on their wedding nights and if you took Utah out of the equation, I bet it’s below 5%.

The absolute worst thing you can do is torment yourself over this. It’s not like your hymen has a tattoo on it that says “Do Not Use If This Seal Is Broken.”

Treat it as a teachable moment. If you don’t want to have sex with a man, absolutely do not take your panties off. And even then try to avoid putting yourself in such a situation because, well, panties can be pulled to the side. But really don’t torture yourself. I mean it. The worst thing you can do is that and then wall yourself off from your future husband. Don’t let a mistake impact your future.

ArkNemesis00 · 2026-07-06T23:09:44+00:00

I'm sorry that this was your first experience with sex. I think most people can relate to having regrets and engaging in self-destructive behavior when going through a rough period in life.

The best place to go from here is to treat yourself with kindness and to avoid temptation. Also to avoid putting yourself in vulnerable situations where you're sort of toeing the line of what you're comfortable with and relying on someone else to respect that and avoid their own temptations.

I think a lot of times that getting sexual attention from men can make us feel very attractive, desirable, and powerful in a way. But when something sexual happens that we didn't fully want than all that goes away and we can feel quite used. It's playing with fire and we often get burned.

Livid_Brick8157 · 2026-07-06T23:26:38+00:00

women need to be strong and not compromise on their values so easily. dating a man doesn’t mean you need to put yourself in situations where you end up in his bed naked. you can never change your past but it’s good that you stopped engaging in that behavior after what happened

CurrentJelly4027 · 2026-07-07T06:39:18+00:00

He took advantage of you

AutoModerator · 2026-07-06T22:58:44+00:00

Title: Regret

Author venusianwarriorangel

Full text: Hey guys. I'm 21.

Initially, I was waiting to save my virginity until marriage. But I went through a dark, stressful period of my life and I had casual sex with a man I don't really know. I spent many of my years isolated, shy, so I am as naïve and "innocent" as you can get.

I never intended to have sex, I told him that. He said he wouldn't have sex with me. I never gave him actual consent, but then he went inside me. It's my fault, I believe, because I got onto his bed naked and I gave in.

I feel robbed somehow. I don't want to do something like this ever again. I also don't want to date or even give a man the chance to talk to me now.

How do we move forwards from this? Most stupid question is, will a man ever love me? I don't know how to forgive myself after what I've done.

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Impossible_Sir_3598 · 2026-07-07T08:27:22+00:00

Don’t take it hard on yourself, we make choices and mistakes in our life’s and live through them. Some decisions have consequences and are irreversible, you can’t do anything except accepting that fact and moving forward. Ofc there will be men who’ll love you. My ex girlfriend was exactly in your situation when I met her. She was groomed at 15 and had sexual experience at 19 with someone who forced herself to become her girlfriend but it was nothing of sorts and it was just that he she had her first sex with him and then they broke up. It didn’t work out between us either really, it was mostly about her isolation and mine aswell, it was long distance and the fact that she had turned from religious to atheist and I was not seeing a future with someone like that.

That_Difference_7638 · 2026-07-07T09:11:27+00:00

Be kind and gentle to yourself. It’s already in the past and All you can change is the future.

It might be a good thing- a catalyst- for you even.

My 2 cents

- it’s near impossible to say no and stay with no with a masculine man (especially at your age). Let’s just say you wouldn’t even want to be with a man who is not overcome with desire for you, and also who would accept your worded no _if you’re already in a room with him, naked on the bed by free will _ in that way, you „did the right thing“ by biological means, even if it meant compromising your values. To accept this dichotomy might be a first step.

- as said before, a „no“ from you that he would be able to take seriously needed to come much earlier. You need to deeply introspect yourself why you compromised your values and why you did not say no to, for example, being unsupervised in the same room with him. Do you struggle in other aspects of life to say no? Because what worth is a YES, if the person cannot articulate a NO? Again try to be very gentle with you and maybe get help from someone you trust or a professional to guide you. I’ve been a people pleaser too and it’s a hard and long way to learn about healthy boundaries, personal space, and really living up to my own standards.

- have you ever learned about vetting? Like how to actually filter „good“ people? Have you already established a high quality friend circle with inspiring, driven people full of life and wealth? Do you know elderly couples who „have what you want“? You might want to work on those. You’re 21 and already know what you’re aiming for- it’s a better position than most young ladies who stumble through life until they get wrinkles- all you need is better focus and aim :) I believe in you, you will be able to live your best life and have joyful marriage later, if you double down now and give yourself time to bloom. It needs training. You got this!

Wife_and_Mama · 2026-07-07T09:25:52+00:00

Forgive yourself. You had sex. Your number is now one. Most men are not going to think much of that if the behavior doesn't continue. I would caution you not to build this up in your mind as being something it wasn't. You do seem to have actively participated if you got naked and got into bed with him. It doesn't sound as though you were raped, but it does seem as though you're dangerously close to convincing yourself of that. That won't help the situation. Take accountability for your role here and make better decisions next time.

Title	Regret
Author	venusianwarriorangel
Upvotes	8
Comments	13
Date	July 6, 2026 10:58 PM UTC (3 weeks ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/1upd7wc/regret/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/regret.1584411 https://theredarchive.com/post/1584411

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