This post isn't going to venture far from the title. I wanted to get this out, because it's the truth. I haven't been able to face my flaws, but at this point I'm tired of them. I work hard day to day at job where I demand very little respect. I go home to a computer screen that I allow to consume 50% of my life. I have been attempting to get in shape and hit the gym for 2+ years and haven't made any noticable physical progress. My financial situation has only recently become somewhat stable and that's because I live with my parents and work 35-40 hours a week, only 2k in my savings at 20 years of age, disgusting. I recently got back into playing wow and it consumes all of my free time, but as much as I love it, I hate myself for it. I didn't go to school this semester because I was too lazy to take charge and create a schedule that had to be followed. I still turn into an emotonal wreck with girls and I disappoint myself every time I do it. The only thing i have come to enjoy about myself is my love for philosophy, theoretical sciences and solitude. This subreddit literally keeps me alive because it's been making me attempt to refocus myself over and over for close to 9 months.

I don't know what I would do without it. I need to decide what I want from my life, stop taking shit, start eating big, starting thinking big, start lifting big, start commanding the respect that I know I deserve, learn to deal with people, learn to drive myself forward. I have been stagnant for two years and as much as I need help to move forward, I know the only person capable of doing that is me. I need to stop being a pussy and think about what is good for me in the long run, what I can do to create a better world in the long run, because as I am now, I am a waste to human resources. There is so much I see in myself and my dreams, but I'm afraid to drop the acts I'm holding up to accomplish them.

Lifting is step one, as it always has been. I have one month to make some serious progress and for those of you who are at a tipping point, let this be for you. Your struggles are internel, let them out, then destroy them. I have no idea what my life will be l IIke 5 years from now if I man up and put in the work, but I know exactly what it will look like if I don't.

I'm 3 months from 21 and I'm afraid to take action. It's time to change that. It starts tonight by getting a solid sleep and starts tomorrow with a glass of water a solid deadlift workout.