Earlier this week, for one of my classes I had to meet with a group for a class project. The group consisted of me and another guy and two girls. The other guy is older than me and has a ton of leadership experience, so it made sense that he made himself the leader of the group. At the start of the meeting, the guy called out on the girls for showing up late and told her that that was unacceptable, he was on a tight schedule and didn't have time to lose. We met at the library and during the meeting 2 different hot girls approached the guy to say Hi and ask what he was doing. The guy was a well read, well dressed, muscular guy that possessed all the dark triad traits. He start giving orders and he was a bit of an asshole.

The next day I ran into one of the girls in group. She was telling one of her other friends (not in the group or class) about the other guy in my group and how much of an asshole he was. Obviously she's attracted to him, or else why would she even talk about the guy to one of her friends and rant on to me for like 15 minutes about how much of an asshole he was.

But, I'm wondering what makes the difference between a girl saying and ranting your an asshole and actually being an asshole? Or is it all the same?