Inspired by a recent post for lurkers to contribute.
It's finals time for me, which means coffee shop studying. Today I overheard three first time dates in a local coffee shop.
Date_1: He waited at least 20m for her to show up. He dressed in some semblance of fashion, but his clothes were wrinkled, wrong for the occasion, and out of season. He hadn't shaved and doesn't work out.
She was post wall, but totes fuckable. Short blonde hair, cute & stylish dress, leggy, and shapely from exercise.
She was disappointed when she saw him, but stayed 45m to talk. Man, was he fucking boring. The entire time he talked about his business and 'practical' toys. It was a list of achievements in the midst of an interview-type date. Within 10m, I knew he had nothing 'fun' going on with his life- nothing. I wondered if he talked to his bros this way. I doubt it, but it would have been better than the shit he was doing.
He bored me to tears, and her too. He was nice and courteous, but he was constantly qualifying himself with his business and mundane, unmemorable shit. Towards the end of the date, she started obviously checking me out. He noticed her smiling at me, turned around and seemed pissy about it.
Lesson: care for your appearance at all times. Take care of yourself. But most of all, have a real fucking life that YOU like/ look forward to everyday. This guy didn't; he sucks.
Date_2: cute, post wall athletic (runner body) in a sun dress. He was a hipster with handlebars, typical hipster, cookie cutter clothes- a copied style. I think this guy was OK, except he said, "i'm sorry" nearly every 3m and constantly qualified/changed his position relative to everything she said. He was really trying, but milquetoast as fuck.
This man had no backbone and absolutely no sense of self, none. He was lonely and willing to trade part of who he was for love/sex. She was turned off, but I think she might have liked him at the start. At one point, he was showing her things on his Mac. It went downhill fast.
Date_3: I didn't see this couple because they came in through another door and sat behind me. They fucking hit it off and left together, all hugged up. From the rear view, they both seemed like stylish.
From the moment they started talking, he talked/flirted with her from a focused point of knowing who he was. I would hang out with this guy. I didn't get a good look at the faces of the last couple, but I doubt he was better looking than the other guys. But, he had a life and cared about himself.
Overall, although I think RP can teach you a lot, but you will never gain any real success with women if you don't care enough about yourself to constantly improve yourself daily, manage your appearance at all times, and love/live life.
The most important thing I learned from all this: The lack of pussy in my life is not the definitive problem of my life. It is the "canary in the coal mine." It is the signal that my unique, possibility- filled, exciting world went to shit a long time ago because I let it. I let me get boring and defeated. In the past, I did trade parts of myself for affection/sex, and that was wrong. I didn't care about myself enough to present a healthy, attractive appearance.
Any who, this will probably get down voted to oblivion, but fuck it- I put something out there.
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