HelpMen in love/Sidebar/Theory Reading

SatanAscending · 2015-11-11T16:25:09+00:00

If I recall correctly, romantic love is coded into men so they bond with females and protect them when they can't defend themselves (pregnancy) and later on, so they protect the offspring. In other words, so they sacrifice themselves (which is the definition of "romantic love" here).

MattyAnon · 2015-11-13T04:44:52+00:00

Most of male romantic love is much less romantic than it appears. Yes it's largely a cultural invention.

Much male bonding to a woman is the fallback beta strategy, to be used when the alpha strategy fails or there is a shortage of women (either way, it's a shortage of women for that man).

There is also a "protecting your investment" aspect, and a "look after the mother of your children" aspect and a very similar "protect the source of future sex / children" aspect. As well as a "get the approval of the woman that sex may occur by being devoted" aspect. Again largely a beta strategy. Men are not Machiavellian enough to fake this, and women test for it hard anyway.

Perhaps most strongly there is a "provide for the potential mother of your children" aspect. In ancient times, women and men needed I'd guess about 10 children to have enough survive into adulthood to continue the population. Women would have needed a lot of provisioning. And given a lack of other options, I can even imagine women being superficially grateful for what they received.

Quick aside: I don't mean beta in a derogatory sense, I mean it as in "stick around and help raise kids" mating strategy. And certainly the feelings of love and devotion towards a woman you are pair bonded with is very real and it feels great. But that doesn't mean she is anything other than what she is.

All the above is very normal male feelings and actions, all with very good and fairly obvious genetic motivations. There is also a very strong social pressure on men to be responsible for women. Societal approval for marriage, and disapproval for seeing lots of women at once. This is an artificial drive, but its effects on men are very real.

So how does the idealized love come into play and why is the woman (somehow) excluded from that?

Women do love. In a way. For a time. But the love is more a feeling of devotion and attraction and need. It doesn't usually involve sacrifice or generosity or actually doing anything much for the man. Why should she? Would that help raise lots of strong children? Probably not. Would sacrificing for a woman help raise lots of strong children? Almost certainly yes, if she's the mother of his children or will be in the future.

Hope this clears things up, good topic.

Title	HelpMen in love/Sidebar/Theory Reading
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	2
Comments	9
Date	November 11, 2015 2:45 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/3serk9/helpmen_in_lovesidebartheory_reading/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/helpmen-in-lovesidebartheory-reading.38052 https://theredarchive.com/post/38052

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