I went through 8 months of emotional and financial hell. My own school tried to bury me through the ground when I was accused. They didn’t even want to listen to me, they immediately believed her. I wasn’t going to go down without a fight though. I hired the best law firm in the country that only deals with high profile sexual assault cases as their focus. I knew this was all bullshit and I was innocent, and I needed to do everything I could do to protect my future from a girl who 180’d me after inviting me over to have sex (explicitly said), and fucked consensually.

After fighting through a long and difficult battle, spending $40,000 on legal fees, and hiring the best firm and forensic pathologists in the country to help keep me in school and win in a very difficult balance of probabilities burden of proof jurisdiction. I was able to get the best deal I could get in a situation like this. A one year suspension. If you’re wondering I am not mad. I am blessed and grateful that I was not expelled. I am doing fine and this in no way will effect my future. However, it was the best out of the situation.

Here are the suggestions my law firm told me in the end.

  1. Do not engage in one night stands in this climate, especially with alcohol involved. I was shocked to hear this, but I trust this response considering this is one of the most high profile firms int eh country, and sexual assault is all they deal with.

  2. If you are a college student, try and avoid hyper sexual culture. Girls nowadays think they can have sex and be liberated without the consequences of being called a hoe. Don’t allow them to make you their scape goat for their actions.

  3. Saving your text messages and having context helps, but it will not save you. I had all the texts and evidence and it still was not enough. The judicators or mediators often fare more about the context as to what happened, “could have happened”, or what “more than likely happened” in university sexual assault cases.

  4. If you’re a university student, just like understanding sexual consent rules, you should be aware of how far the school is willing to let you go to protect yourself. Sexual assault cases in school are not like the criminal court. In criminal court it’s much much easier to protect yourself, and most of the times charges are acquitted and you walk free. This is not the same for university campuses, where prosecutors have to prove that sexual assault could have had a greater than 50% chance of happening.

  5. You need affirmative consent prior to having sex every time, and consent is on going, and can be withdrawn at any moment.