I am Italian and I live between my home country and Portugal. Few people are probably aware of that, but the two cultures are extremely different. Italian women want men with extremely tight game, and all foreigners saying that Italian women are difficult since they are Catholic, simply do not have enough game. Portuguese women are very appearance-oriented: before bearing children, they want a man showing good genetics - much more than in other countries I know; after bearing children, they want to protect THEIR appearance, in the sense of looking for side situations with men that do not kiss and tell. In fact, I found that married Portuguese women with children are much easier to bed than other species, as long as you fly low.
I was shocked finding out that both worlds have the same reaction to muscularity.
I have been very fit for years, but I have never been big, and I am not particularly tall. I was probably a 7.5 for my physique if we focus on fitness. I was able to have fun with women in both countries, but needed both game and luck. Some years ago I had health issues and got fat. I started training MMA to speed up losing weight, I got kind of big but still quite fat (1.74m, >85 kilos). I was still unhappy with my dad bod.
I have never had an easier life than now.
Women do not consider that my abs are hidden beneath fat. They just touch my shoulders and biceps. Both in social situations and in bed with women that I had "met" when I was fitter, women give me an easier time and more validation. I am not at weightlifter level, I am just slightly bigger and larger than most people around. Obviously, women are oblivious of that, they just say they NOW like me as a person.
Best of all, the few women that fat-shamed me, later on proposed to get a drink with me somewhere.
TL;DR: Guys, do MMA or lift or whatever you do, but get muscles, you need them!
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I've read a lot of material on bodycomposition. Whether triglycerides are released or stored in a fat cell is controlled by hormones. The production, effect on cellular receptors etc by these hormones is dictated by your genetics and epi-genetics. Because men and women have differing hormonal make ups the places in which fat aggregates most in the body differs as well. Even though calorie intake vs expenditures dictates total fat accumulation.
I'm confused what your guyses points even were anymore after writing this but I think both of you are right you're just talking about different things: distribution (hormonal) vs total accumulation (stuffing yo face)
Edit /u/livefreeordiemaga
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