I want to express my beliefs of why men are struggling so much today, feel free to give feedback and share your point of view. major edits done after the first 3 hours

We're being taught wrong when we grow up or not taught at all

Many guys will grow up with traditional values poured into their young minds through the media full of cliques about romance and dating. Leading you to believe you need a woman for fulfillment; they actually like the nice boring guys more often than not; some guys are just born with the natural chiseled abs and status to get girls and the average Joe will never be them so they got to compromise and white knight. Their parents will have a traditionalist point of view (or just be terrible at teaching) and will not understand how this view, which has not adapted to social change as readily, will hamper their sons and a lesser degree their daughters. The lack of personal development and financial development versus the higher standard of educational learning is bewildering. Eventually, when puberty hits they will discover porn and well guess what they will never have to confront a real woman if they don't want to, I would look to Japan with its horrific virgin population of 4 out of 10 for both genders from ages 18 to 34. Testosterone and pent up sexual desire can go a long way I imagine.

Social Media and Entertainment has become the crutch of Social Success

People today have more no commitment ways distract themselves then possible a century ago. Before they would at least be physically and socially active by going to the comic store for comics or library as nerds and playing sports to hang out and have fun as competitive guys. This would have lead to more opportunities for real life social development. Now the internet can satisfy almost any desire in one form or another. They can read articles, watch documentaries, podcast, Netflix, youtube, porn (always interesting, right), play video games, get second-hand experience through vlogs of other people's successful lives.An average now guys might go to school interact with only the few people next to them in class, join that one club they have to, participate that one time a week. On the way there and back they can play with their phone loaded with social media apps, listen to music or play a handheld console. At home they may literally spend hours plug into their computer with that no effort basically drug addiction tick.It saddens me how greatly we waste time with these entertainments, including myself, how much we will spend and probably continue to spend. Even this reddit is a form of that.Before guys might at least be forced to socialize with someone in their neighborhood as they grow quickly bored of their house.

Turbo Changing Social Status Quo and Snail Pace Social Standards

The gain of women rights and social standing over these decades have also been substantial, I'm not here to say that it's wrong, it's fair to not let gender decide how crap your life can be. However, this is detrimental to the traditional model where a guy had more authority through his financial and political power and thus had that measure of status as confidence to dominate a woman. Women were more willing to accept a fairly decent sucker that wasn't the thrill of their life because of traditionalism. Times have changed and we now need to rethink traditionalism as a core dogma of society. What this calls for is a movement of social reform like the red pill which is not gonna gain favor with 50% of the population because they don't like being manipulated which is fair enough. But this would require women to truly step up their game to fix this gender double standard of how dating works, for example, guys need to approach, pay, and arrange dates and other nonsense when they say gender equality. Equally not likely to happen. This leaves us in social limbo, but this limbo is actually worse than that because education is less valuable than when it was the golden door to status before and wages have stagnated over the decades with the average 30year old earning less than their parents at the same age and with more debt than them. Financial pressures are working against a man's ability to afford a relationship and reel in a high-value mate.

Networking Gain and Society Lose

Innovation has also opened up greatly the dating pool with more guys and girls available to each individual but yet more people are marrying later and more divorces happen than before. This is the problem of how choices will not always mean better results cough Betsy Devos. Social Dynamics now make people think they can always find a better relationship and find commitment irrational. Unrealistic standards are imposed against potential partners by the other gender. They want a smart handsome well manner edgy who understands yet doesn't care and can be the guy you can bring home yet is actually a wolf... etc, paraphrasing from a comedy skit I can't remember, but was gold. This also works in reverse for the guys as well. Unrealistic standards hurts society and your happiness, I'm not saying you shouldn't hit on the hottest girl you can find but that you should find someone right and don't be dumb about it, or just be dumb about it while you still can, 10-30 years range for most people. No you didn't understand relationships before 10 years old when you were in 3rd grade, not happening. Lesson: Understand that no one is perfect, yet not everyone is worth it, or practically no one.

Female Sex Symbol versus Male Sex Symbol

The last point I discuss is the the prevalence of the female sex symbol versus the male sex symbol in the media. The reasoning being females are meant to attract males through visual cues for mating potential. However, this distinctly visually aware society has hurt the male image which is mostly through an appeal of strengths other than physical (nowadays, I'm sure hunters and gathers would be like that man has such large biceps hot damn, call the police and firemen...) Before you even meet a girl you might feel visually intimidated by her hotness, most/some girls have quite weak frames when compare to how good they look. What I'm saying is there needs to be an increase in Male Sex Symbols. A higher percentage of girls are only so hot because they look at the retard amounts of media around that indicates they need to be hot. Go to a mall there's gonna be stores filled with shoes, clothes, lingerie, bags, makeup and jewelry. Much sparsely emphasize is men's fashion and the underlying stereotype that it's gay. Guys need to realize and get with the program on Male Sex Symbols. I want you to look at a male model and think he's hot and then what can I do to be equally hot. I understand you have different priorities, I have different priorities but I thinking about the status quo, gender double standards that needs to be fixed. Keep in mind Sex Symbols have definitely had a negative impact on the mental condition of the average looking guy or girl, I will say that it is unavoidable similarly with any other status criteria and that a healthy mind from proper self-development should know better.

Hey you made it down here, thanks for listening. What are your ideas and thoughts? Upvote if you think this is a valuable topic to be discussed.