New to this validation and framing thing, am I doing it right?

chikinpickle · 2013-05-30T20:23:04+00:00

I'm gonna start by breaking down your convo and then show you another example.

You: Would you say I'm fun to be around? ;) (You're seeking validation from her. You fucked up with your first text. Combine that with the winky face? Cringey. Also sets up a frame of insecurity, seeking her approval.)

Her: I would say I'm fun to be around, but I get told that sometimes I GET REAL! (She rejects your frame, replaces it with hers. By rejecting yours and saying shes fun she sets up a frame of you being boring and her being fun. Issues you a challenge with the get real bit. Shes fun and challenging now)

You: Awesome blahblahblah most fun thing you've ever done blah blah blah seeking rapport seeking rapport seeking rapport. (You play into her frame and seek rapport. She has you on the hook now and the power balance is in her favor. She should be seeking rapport with you. Game over.)

Your text game is weak. Drink deep of the knowledge here. Take your failures like a man and learn from them.

Let me give you another example of frame control. Because communication with women is all about framing, context, and indirectness. So you need to get this shit down. If you master it, your dealings with women will go very well.

Me: Whats the favorite food at a nudist colony? (I like texting girls dumb, off color jokes. It gets their attention over the hordes of "hey" and "hey whats up" texts they get from chodes. Lets be real, check out your competition for a change. Im not impressed with most of it.)

Her: depends on which nudist colony (Here shes bullshitting my joke and being uncooperative, trying to flip the script on me and get me to be the one asking questions. She wants to set up a frame of me qualifying myself to her).

Me: So you've been to multiple nudist colonies? (Follow up with a question, but reject her frame. Not so much qualifying here as throwing a curveball, the important thing is I don't play into it. More of a sidestep than anything)

Her: Don't ask questions you don't want to know the answers to.. (Shit test, this is framed up to make me look like I can't handle her. Also framed up to make me look beta, as beta guys will ask about that kinda shit, then get insecure when they find out their little flower prances around naked checking out guys cocks.)

Its very important to deal with these framing shit tests correctly. Because if you play into her frame it can be very difficult to recover if you have good game. Next to impossible with average game.

Me: I don't think you've figured out what kind of man I am quite yet. (I outright reject her frame here. I set up my own frame. I self identify as a man, establish a masculine identity outright. By saying that she hasn't figured it out yet implies that she has been trying to. Implies her interest in me. Also issues a subtle challenge. I set up the frame that she wants to figure me out, that shes curious. After all, attraction is curiosity: about your cock)

Now to see if she bites!

Her: Hmm probably not. The most recent nudist colony I went to had blah blah blah and mashed potatoes :)

(As you can see shes played into my frame, admitting she hasn't figured me out. This is compliance. Then continued the conversation, and a smiley face. EDIT: By cooperating and giving out information bs or no [I don't know if shes trolling or serious.] she builds rapport with me)

I'm not responding to it, as I'm going on a rock climbing trip with her and friends Friday so I will continue gaming then.

I think this chick is probably into you but you game is weak. Texting takes a while to master though. Keep at it.

redpillschool · 2013-05-30T16:11:28+00:00

The real trick to building a little rapport is getting her to ask you questions.

musicvita25 · 2013-05-30T09:41:49+00:00

This is a problem I have noticed last few years, and I have to thank mystery for this. "The Interview" the more questions you ask the more you will be the interviewer, and she will have all the answers ready because she gets asked this around 10 times a day.

So make statements and not ask questions.

Also, Women are like milk, they can go off after a while, and especially you can be sour to them if you don't close within the first 2-3 weeks at the very very maximum. The longer you prolong it the more likely you'll push her away.

I'd also avoid dating sites, ive actually managed to meet far more women in the field, and have far more dates that way, instead of sitting in my pjs and messaging "women", for all you know she could be a man, ouch.

rkg-pua · 2013-05-30T12:09:30+00:00

Dating websites are lame. If you have any sort of physical presence, you're better off in the real world.

Source: used dating websites, now pulling women wherever I go.

forgot_the_pw · 2013-05-30T11:15:57+00:00

"ha!" can be interpreted a few ways, but I'd assume it was less of an actual laugh or "lol" and more of a "that's clever."

I would have left it after she said "ha!" and get her to pull back in to offering up the electrifying experience.

I agree w/ musicvita's comment on prolonging it. Wrap it up soon and just get her #, arrange to meet up or whatever. Don't get too chatty about anything.

Also, cut down on the winky faces. Could come off as too "needy nice-guy trying to make you comfortable" and try-hard.

That said, whatever you do, keep at it and learn from every experience.

disclaimer: zero experience on dating sites.

Title	New to this validation and framing thing, am I doing it right?
Author	sdogger
Upvotes	2
Comments	26
Date	May 30, 2013 8:36 AM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1fbr4l/new_to_this_validation_and_framing_thing_am_i/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/new-to-this-validation-and-framing-thing-am-i.4615 https://theredarchive.com/post/4615

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