Something I've always had trouble with growing up as a beta was trusting my decisions. I'd often always be looking to others for affirmation on my decision or making sure it was "correct" I got bullied a lot throughout high school and I became very passive and reliant on what others thought of me. At home my dad was the generic nice guy. If someone cut him in line he would stay quiet, if someone was confrontational he would step back, he was quiet and even afraid to talk to other men.

At 17/18 I decided I wanted to change myself. I lifted weights, improved my public speaking and posture, got more confident with girls, and I stopped being a pushover. However now and then I still find myself making that same mistake of not being sure enough of my decision as the right choice. Fast forward to yesterday, I'm 19 now first year in college and taking a quiz. I had utter confidence in all my choices until the last question where a guy behind me says "there's no way it's gonna be A" the answer I had put down was A. At first I kind of ignored it but after a minute I found myself changing my answer and second guessing myself. I ended up changing it to C, and at the end of class I found out I was right and the answer was A. While I wasn't aware of it at the time, looking back I realized just how hard that behavior is ingrained in me and I'll be making a conscious effort to having more confidence in my own abilities.

What I learned: my opinions and answers are just as valid as anyone else's. I'm a man and I don't have to seek validation from anyone. I decide how I'll succeed and my future, not anyone else.