Summary

There is no fake it till you make it when it comes to an IDGAF mentality. Your attachment to anything is very black and white. If you use IDGAF as a technique to get chicks, guess what, you still care.

Body:

The power of not giving a fuck was cemented into my night yesterday and I've been inspired to touch on the subject here. More specifically what it is and what it isn't.

IDGAF is NOT a technique, it can not be used to its full extent by trying to gain anything by it. It is a manifestation of thoughts, words, and actions that can only be truly powerful when it is authentic. If you want to use an appearance of IDGAF in order to attract women, you still care and that fringe need for the validation or pussy or whatever it is, will betray you at some point in the form of neediness.

Now what do I mean when I say that it`s a black and white concept?

Take for example a non-smoker and an ex-smoker who recently quit. Someone offers both guys a cigarette, who has an easier time turning it down even though on paper they both don't smoke? Right, the non-smoker because he has no internal conflict, not smoking is part of his identity and it is his authentic desire.

The same applies to not giving a shit. If you really don't fucking care, then everything you do gives off that impression and people can absolutely tell when it's real and when it isn't.

On to how this played out in real life the other day:

When leaving a school music fest my circle merged with a few others to hit up an end of the year after-party hosted by a club. I'm not into rave shit so naturally I was in a carefree fuck it mood about everything. That's when I met T.

T is chill, small, kinda cute, and has some of the juiciest melons I've ever seen. By the rest of the groups standards, she was the #1 draft pick there, however, I'm just not really into it.

Throughout the whole rest of the evening, she's getting supplicated by guys who want her attention, or just a shot at shooting a glance down her shirt. Out of all of the other guys I was with it dawned on me later on that:

I was the only one to always keep a joking attitude, a smirk, and strong eye contact like I would with any other guy who's balls I'm busting. Also using openly sexual humor directed at her.

The only one to disagree with her, ignore her, fuck with her, and not eat up scraps of her attention.

The only fucking person not to do weak shit at some point like hold her bag for an hour or buy her a drink because she asked (this shit got me having a noticeable 'wtf' expression I'm sure)

The only one not validating her mediocre GPA or other stupid shit.

Now, just to be clear all of that can be done by intentionally avoiding those behaviors, but the difference is that I never thought about any of it until basically writing this. It was the most effortless and natural interaction possible on the basis that it was 100% real.

And so where did my apathy towards this chick lead?

Well, to me ending conversations with her to go do my own thing and not stick around like an idiot, it led to me having a great time with buddies which was the mission anyways, it led to me hooking up with girls in front of her and hearing her complain that I was a "fuckboy dick" to which I found hilarious and agreed with. And ultimately, it led to her asking for my number just to confirm 5 times we were going home the same way and she could just "walk home" from my place because its so close ( well there's the cover incase anyone asks i guess ).

So really, I want to stress that it's not only okay not to give a fuck, it's actually what people want from you and if you can get over this notion that the mainstream world pushes that tells you not giving a shit will somehow make you a serious, uncompassionate asshole who lives a life like the Grinch, then your life can really enter a new level of freedom.

Lessons Learned

Not giving a shit is crucial to help fostering true outcome independence

Not caring makes it much harder for weak tendencies to come about, you'll be less needy and more attractive without having to micromanage yourself.

Don't train yourself not to care, if you don't wanna care about something then just fucking stop caring.

Not caring gives you freedom from stress and anxieties, and eliminates the burden of constant willpower.

Have people identify you as being funny, if you struggle with it, work on it because it makes a lot of difference in being likable or being a cunt.