Uber Human, certain years old

I possess 4 infant human accessories from 4 different servant-units. They are my albatrosses, so if you can’t handle that, blink left.

Currently employed with Freedom Dividend UBI, Inc (kek kek)

Will never disclose the following:

  • Size, shape, or location of my genitalia - current or past
  • Past incarcerations
  • Past number of neo quasi-transIntimate partners
  • Location or descriptions of sperm generators

Looking for wealthy servant-unit to fund my virtual empire building endeavors. In exchange you may read this profile twice. If you are VERY generous, I MAY send you a photo of my toe. NOTE: It is legal for me to send it, but illegal for you to view it (kek kek - praise be Supreme Commander Chelsea Clinton!)

Upon meeting, I suggest that you bow down in worship, and immediately beg for mercy. Also, I show no mercy, so just worship me and then blink me 2 million block-coins, or I will call the military servant-units to have you extricated from your corporeal unit.

You have accepted and consumed my text, so I expect a gratitude payment.

Disclaimer: Receipt and viewing of this profile meets the criteria for common law marriage in all 32 states. My divorce force will enter your home shortly to remove my belongings from your possession.

You may now commence lamentation and despair.