The original post from here, although I've re-pasted it with additional details.

I'm new to RP. 31/M. My physical stats are: 5'9", 165 lbs, 20% body fat. Started lifting a couple of weeks ago, following Stronglifts and keeping a close watch of my macros. Going through the books on the sidebar. Found RP after realizing that I needed to be more assertive because I work with some real assholes at work.

I've been married for a couple of years. Even though we have been doing long distance (job reasons) for the majority of the time, the relationship is absolutely fine, no dead bedrooms or anything - well, I mean the logistics also don't really work out.

However, there's a lot of confidence issues on my end. I grew up in a very strict household without a father, and my mother was always spewing shit about how all men are evil, which meant severe sexual repression growing up. My social skills are okay, although being an introvert I'm not stellar at meeting new people and find it quite tiring. Once I've warmed up to a person I become much more natural. I'm terrible with girls though, and honestly it was just the right environment and momentary headspace that got me the confidence to ask my wife out at the time.

Also, I've got a strong sense of lust. Several factors seem to exacerbate this:

  1. long distance (i.e. forced monk mode),
  2. feeling like I'm forever locked to one girl because of marriage (only ever dated my wife), and
  3. part of me just really wants to hookup with a cute girl to seek validation for my self-esteem.

I was most surprised by the 2nd point - up until now I've been so focused on my career that the oneitis didn't bother me especially before marriage, as my reptilian brain had this notion that even if things didn't work out there are other girls out there. After the marriage, however, I have this increasing notion that I'm "trapped" with my wife, despite being very happy with her.

If I were single, I'd be going out every night to meet girls and improving my game. However, not sure how viable that is for married folks. I feel like this grab bag of issues I listed above is slowly tearing me apart though. For example, I spend a lot of time reading about pickup - even considering some coaching.

On the original /r/MRP post, the responses suggested that basically I'm seeking permission to go out and meet people to get validation because of confidence issues. I mostly agree, but would like to seek any further advice you guys might have on my situation.

Oh yeah, last but not least, I've stopped watching porn 3 weeks ago.