Fucking confused.

JCX_Pulse · 2020-10-24T15:10:32+00:00

Fathers should be enraged reading this.

You’re a huge fucking pussy. How did labia majora grow into a human and become sentient?

You cheat on your first wife, poorly vet, marry crazy, and go “I don’t get it”

You have no backbone. How the fuck do you even ask a question that boils down to “my wife disrespects my kids, what do I do?”

You fucking stand up for your fucking kids you fucking twat!

You have no backbone, no self-respect, you lie and cheat and hide and grovel and live life scared. You should be really proud of yourself. It’s a wonder your kids even want to be around you.

austinography · 2020-10-24T14:15:34+00:00

These are YOUR kids. You need to tell her that expression of favoritism in any way, especially in front of either of them, is completely unacceptable. And be prepared to deliver consequences if this boundary is crossed. She will respect you for this, or she is not a quality woman.

Failure to do the above is simply a continuation of your nice guy bitch behavior and you know it.

throwawaywayway998 · 2020-10-24T14:05:07+00:00

Your "stream of thought" writing style is a bit hard to read.

It sounds like this is their stepmom? I think you're seriously over-thinking what you asked about.

My problem is that I don’t want my kids to be compared in terms of favourite. I want both to feel so loved that they both want to be here forever.

How do I tell her that’s what I want?

Like this:

I want both my kids to feel so loved that they both want to be here forever. I don't want them to be compared in terms of favourite.

You don't have to sound like a dick when saying what you want. Don't say it in a tone that says you're expecting a bad reaction, or with defensive body language. Work it into a normal conversation about the kids if it makes it easier.

It's not an argument after that. I don't think a reasonable person would try to argue with that, and you certainly won't entertain one.

She's either compliant or she's not. She is replaceable, they are not. That's a boundary, and there's the consequence for crossing the boundary.

SelectAirline · 2020-10-24T22:12:41+00:00

You're afraid of your wife.

Nothing that anyone here can tell you will materialize into action until you come to terms with that.

TheVitaminD · 2020-10-24T17:09:16+00:00

Stfu was a mistake. You should have set a hard boundary. Something like, "You will not speak to my kids that way. This is not negotiable. This conversation is over. If you have any problem with that, you can go."

I hope you have the spine to stand up to her.

Frosteecat · 2020-10-24T19:06:21+00:00

Maybe you can swing a discount on therapy for you and the kid who isn’t loved as much. You are in the weeds. Elevate and get some perspective ffs.

UnPussified · 2020-10-25T04:54:32+00:00

15 Push-ups?

YGBFKM.

Your first problem is your brain.

Second problem is your mouth & keyboard.

Third problem is these are all connected.

Stop DOING relationship.

Do Tangible, Measurable Results. Work. Money. Lift. Train. Coach. Teach. Mentor. Apply this to everything & everyone else but NOT your wife:

And Stop thinking about your wife as a POS FFS.

That’s why you’re wrapped around her sadistic little pinky-finger.

As for your kids, all you’re doing is punishing them by pointing out you married a POS, by arguing with a POS.

Either DTB & go it alone, or STFU about the fact that you married a POS & don’t want to (can’t) enforce any boundaries, which is exactly why she’s doing all this sh!t to you & your kids in the first place.

She twists knife in your kid’s ribs, you squeal.

When you can look in a mirror & think “I wish I was that guy”, then come back here with meaningful questions. At which point you’ll reflect back on this post & realize you were asking for cheat codes on how to fix everyone & everything else, except you.

Knock that sh!t off & start working on you.

nantucketghost · 2020-10-26T00:37:48+00:00

No need to make it into a huge ordeal or even over think this. Just tell her you heard her say he's your "favorite" and that she can't do that. There are no favorites even if there is one. The reality is, there will always be one. Favorite dog (if you have two), favorite whatever. It's a reality.

The catch is: She can't say it. I love you both equally. I love the both of you, etc, etc.

Just tell her that you can't have her picking favorites, despite knowing there is going to be one.

wellhouboutthat · 2020-10-25T22:19:45+00:00

Holy shitballs. YOU DON'T EVEN LIFT, BRO.

You've already had some very correct feedback. But damn, son. I bet you make excuses for everything. Has there ever been a situation where you didn't make excuses? I don't care if you have no gyms open. Those who want to, will figure it out.

You married crazy, you're terrified of crazy and you'll make excuses for her for the rest of eternity. Wanna know why I know? She tells one of your kids that he's her favourite, and what do you do? You shut your fucking mouth and hamster out some stupid excuses for your wife's behavior. This is as big a deal as physical abuse. Based upon my childhood, I could make the argument that it's even worse. There is NOTHING more important than your kids' physical and mental health. You don't get to be selfish, hoping that she'll fuck you later if you back down like a bitch.

There should be no competition. You are both fucked up. Playing one upmanship with your wife is a teenager's move. "but mommy, I had a bad childhood too!" Yeah, so I did I. So did most of us here. If we didn't, we probably wouldn't be here.

You've read some material, but you haven't even begun the work. You need to put EFFORT into this shit. You will not change without it. You don't get to be Tom Brady by WATCHING him throw the football. You fucking PRACTICE.

Title	Fucking confused.
Author	throwawaywayway998
Upvotes	7
Comments	16
Date	October 24, 2020 1:24 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/jh8urw/fucking_confused/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/fucking-confused.322435 https://theredarchive.com/post/322435

Comments