Angry, Devastated and Disappointed.

Whisper · 2016-01-04T04:16:44+00:00

https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/3zd6q3/the_bitch_management_hierarchy_study_guide/

steelseries52 · 2016-01-03T20:39:09+00:00

You were a BB for her.

Do you even know what TRP is?

Also I'm all for religion, but Pastors are preaching idiots that try to see the "good" in everyone. Sorry but the world is a harsh and cold place.

Dr_Van_Nosstrand · 2016-01-03T23:09:21+00:00

You follow classic RP tenets:

Maintain frame
Only speak to her about work related issues and only when necessary
Ignore any and all advances she will make, and trust us, SHE WILL MAKE THEM EVENUTALLY
Use everything about this experience to better yourself

RunawayGrain · 2016-01-04T00:14:06+00:00

ok so yesterday my LTR of 1.5yrs left me for her baby daddy. i met this girl last summer volunteering at the time she had just been dumped by her bf who accused her of cheating on him and getting pregnant.

So she's an alpha widow...

Me being a good christian i helped her out when her parents kicked her out and none of her family wanted to help her. we started dating and i got her on her feet i helped her with everything relating the the baby and her well being. i got her a job where i work making 50k a year i got her a car and i helped her save so she could get her own place i got her back on her feet.

and she tagged you as beta buxx pretty fast.

Im deeply in love with her and i thought that she was also in love with me until about 3 weeks ago when her baby daddy came back in the picture and wanted to see the boy. I grew up without a father so i couldn't deny or get mad if his father wanted to be back in the picture so i let it slide.

Firstly, you aren't in love with her. You are in love with an image of the perfect woman that your mind has pinned onto her. Secondly, she really wanted dad back the entire time, but you were the meal ticket. Dad probably wants back in the picture because she has a job and steady income now, which you have provided.

Yesterday she calls me out of the blue and tells me her and her exbf are going to give it another shot for the sake of the baby and that i can come pick up my stuff after church or else her exbf would throw them away.

I'm assuming exbf is daddy, and he's living with her.

im heartbroken and angry idk how i could be so naive to think that i had found my unicorn.

I wouldn't be heartbroken. She did you a favor, because she could have married you first and taken half your stuff plus alimony and support payments and probably accusations that you were 'abusive.' You got off easy.

I feel betrayed by my pastor, my ex and my own family telling me that she was all part of "god's" plan for my life.

Why are you asking other people what Gods plan for your life is? Go find it for yourself. Read up in the bible about what constitutes marriage material, mainly being a virgin, and ask yourself if she fit that bill. The answer for about 99% of women nowadays is no.

Also, your family and pastor probably realized she was trash and just didn't want to alienate you or hurt your feelings. Make of that what you will.

I gave her everything and helped her during the worst time of her life and she spits on my face for a guy who doesn't even have a car, a cellphone or a fucking bank account.

Here is most of the problem. You gave her stuff and expected her to repay you by falling madly in love forever. Maybe that's slightly simple, but it is the gist of the transaction. People in general, though, appreciate what they have to work for, and she didn't have to work for you. She had to work for baby daddy, hard, and this, in her mind, was demonstrated by his willingness to bail on her and the kid.

My question for you gentleman is how do i deal with this when we both work in the same building and go to the same church so i have to see her everyday so should i ignore her and pretend she doesn't work there or do i just hold frame and act like the last 1.5yrs didn't happen?

My crazy ex pulled some of this about thirty years ago, and it looks like its only recently came to a head. So here is some battle tested advice: Your mission is to be polite and be brief. All she has to do to fuck you up royally is start spreading some rumors. Most people will split the difference and assume that you are a creep if she does. In that event get ready to bail on your entire social circle and up and move out if necessary.

Here's the other crazy part, again based on experience: Baby daddy is just around because she's got the job, car, and house that you provided her. Once that's gone, so is he, and she will come back to the well -- you -- again. You then have to get rid of her without her pulling any of the above on you as well. It's a bad situation, but you are stuck in damage control mode now.

Th good news is, you now get a chance to improve yourself, get out there, and start pulling girls who are a thousand times better than this wench.

nastynickdr · 2016-01-04T00:41:11+00:00

Your sacrifices are expected. What matters to her is what you can provide her right NOW, not what you did in the past. She has the tingles for ex and not for you, she is in a better situation now, so you are not needed anymore. She does not have attraction for you. Men are disposable.

Now, would you really want to be with a woman that has no attraction for you, wont want to have sex with you, will nag and resent you, or would you rather get one that actually is horny for you?

Read the sidebar and improve yourself.

SlothOnRoids · 2016-01-04T05:57:01+00:00

I can already tell you are waaaay too nice of a guy.

I was in a similar situation several years ago, I usually already nuke even a shred of possibility of getting into a relationship with a single mom, USUALLY negatives outweigh the pros most of the time. She's always going to put her kid before you, baby daddy drama is potentially way more trouble than it's worth and not to mention you have to think that if things DO go smoothly with her you are now acting as a guardian of the child and probably in some point in time will be helping out with other responsibilities regarding the child depending on how old they are of course. It is to say the least, a major life impacting decision.

In my case, I got with my girl who got knocked up by some guy who turned out to be a major bum ass dude. I'm talking no car, no job, no worthwhile education, just a typical waste of life. I really liked her, I did have some apprehensions about dating her because really, you gotta question how some women even get into situations like this, what did she even see in that guy in the first place I'll never know. But anyway, back on topic. They weren't together anymore and I found out that he was messaging her and texting her that he wanted to see his kid and a yada yada. Me being a nice guy I told her she shouldn't keep the guy away from his kid, it's only right that she allow him to see her every week. But as I found out very soon the guy had ulterior motives, he found out she was seeing me, and became jealous I was with her and only wanted to see his kid so he could get back with my girl.

I was in the car one time as she's dropping off his kid and he let her in the house for a few minutes, and I'm thinking to myself "why the fuck is she going in his house, this should be a simple drop off and go". She comes back out a few minutes later laughing and smiling with the guy as she's leaving and at this point I'm furious. Now nothing happened in the house for me to be worried about she was just getting her daughter settled but the fact that she seemingly still had even a little bit of attraction to this guy set off red flags like crazy. How could you be smiling in this guy's face that hasn't payed a dime of child support, wasn't at the hospital while your daughter was born and supposedly physically assaulted you before?

I pretty much spazzed out and set boundaries that she was never to be alone with or out of sight with this guy ever again or I'm done with the relationship. Eventually shit played out where the guy dug his own grave and wasn't taking care of his daughter the way he should have and now he's not allowed to see her anymore, and there's more details to the story but I'll cut to the chase and say the point of my post was to reiterate that even if you do everything you think you're supposed to and you're a better man than he was in most every other way there will ALWAYS be a connection to her kids father and you have to constantly be on high alert because there's a good possibility she will cheat on you with him or go back to him at some point. It happens every fucking day, and guess what now you have made her a "come up" to him. She's now making good money, and more valuable to him now that you upgraded her. I GUARANTEE he's going to end up fucking her over again, they will break up and she will be trying to crawl back to you, whatever you fucking do, do not even give her the time of day anymore and move the fuck on.

Your best bet in the future don't even fuck with single moms anymore, it's way more trouble than it's worth.

Title	Angry, Devastated and Disappointed.
Author	steelseries52
Upvotes	6
Comments	13
Date	January 3, 2016 8:33 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/3zbca7/angry_devastated_and_disappointed/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/angry-devastated-and-disappointed.158719 https://theredarchive.com/post/158719

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