I'm a 20 yo guy, I think a lot of my boyishness and child like(beta) ways comes from an overprotective mom and absentee dad.

I have a girlfriend, she's a great girl and all but I don't think she respects me. It sounds stupid but it's like all she wants these days is sex, an emotional connection has always been my #1 thing(hence why I'm in a relationship) but she only wants me for a sex/cuddle/boyfriend to be cute with. It makes me feel used in a weird way, but i'm scared to tell her that because I know she'll be super upset and make me feel like shit.

that all seems pretty beta when I see the truth typed out like that

My gut and my heart says to just leave this all behind, go team up with my best friend across the country and live by my own rules. My dad says that's running away, but what does he know?

TL;DR: I'm not a man, I don't know how to be. My goal isn't to score chicks or get rich as fuck, but just to live my life according to myself. How can I get that confidence?