There’s a younger black girl who keeps coming around my desk and talking to me at work. At first it seemed like she was always trying to show off her body to me,but I kinda ignored her unless she actually spoke to me...this scenario happened a lot. I’m paranoid about flirting at work (even tho sometimes I do it anyways) and I’m wondering if I should even be friendly to her. She seems really phony ,she’s overly draws attention to herself and I’m suspicious of her.

She asks me why I don’t come out to the bars with her and her friends (because I don’t wanna be an orbiter )....anyways.

We get to talking when she come up to my desk then she keeps pointing out how skinny I am and said I looked super skinny like I was sick.

My reply was “yea,I’m skinny”. In a tone where I’m like “duh,hats an obvious fact...”. I’m actually insecure about it,although I’m getting better.

My question is why the hell would she say something like that to me? Is she trying to “get back at me “ for not giving her a ton of attention? Or because I don’t wanna be sort of her Beta orbiter club?Why would someone say something that rude unprovoked?

And if I reply with anger I like weak,but if I reply too nice I also look weak.in my mind I have now decided that she is toxic but I just know she’s gonna come around again under the guise of cordial small talk and banter....how can I just tell her to buzz off without being seen as a hostile male in the workplace?