Confusion as a new member.

El_Rojo_Pildora · 2013-08-23T17:18:03+00:00

In my relatively new experience, I understand it this way:

Alpha is your own self loyalty. It's where you express who you authentically are to the world. Typically it includes the biological PUA frame, but I don't think it has to. Pure alpha means that the decision to act or not act comes completely from within yourself. You don't give a fuck what anybody else thinks, they can take you or leave you. This tends to be attractive to women, as well as brings you higher quality male friends who share that sense of self respect. As long as you are going from your own internal guide, then you are being alpha. Working on developing your own sense of self and working to express it is definitely alpha. No beta about it. As you put forth effort to develop this, even if you've never really done it before, you are in an alpha frame. You know your value and your potential and you are moving towards it. It doesn't matter where you are now, it matters what direction you are moving.

Beta is your sense of loyalty to others. This is important for a long term relationship to work out. You can't be a good father or husband without some beta frame. Beta is where you voluntarily (and it's always voluntary) put aside what you want to meet someone else's needs. Sometimes this is critical, like during a legitimate crisis at home or when kids have genuine needs that conflict with your own at a given moment. If you care about what the other person is going through, and have empathy for them, you are being beta. This trait can be abused by people in our lives to cause a guilt conflict and then we choose to relinquish what alpha we had in the first place. Most people don't have trouble being beta. It's not something we have to practice like being alpha is.

The big problem with myself and many other men in our over feminized society is that we were taught that alpha is wrong and should be shunned, while beta is right and should be pursued at all costs. This is ingrained in so many of us in our childhood that when we finally grow up and take the RP, we can believe it but can't really feel it right away. It takes time and practice to bring on the alpha frame that is absolutely fundamentally a part of a man's biology and psychology after such a long period of brainwashing.

It is not, I repeat NOT beta to practice at alpha and fail. The alpha part of yourself that we all are trying to develop never takes a failure as a disparagement of self worth. You have intrinsic value, you are damn important and your life matters. Failure cannot take that away from you. It's an opportunity to improve yourself, to bring into physical manifestation the innate alpha that makes up who you are.

Change is hard. But change is worth it. Embrace the process and really find out who you are and express it to the world. When you find someone worth caring about in your life, adding in the beta makes you a complete man. Until then, your alpha needs to guard your beta to keep it from being abused by unscrupulous people. Always alpha first, then beta second. Alpha is freely given because it just exists in indifference to the world. Beta is earned by the commitment of other people to yourself.

Hope that helps.

soapjackal · 2013-08-25T03:49:25+00:00

Well here's how I look at it.

The Red Pill is just truth on sexual relations. How people think. Use it as a tool not to get suckered into how you've been taught women think.

Alpha/beta are ways of describing sexual attitudes and social status.

If you're looking for being a better man/human I would look towards the stoics or the taoists as a start and a finish in those virtuous pursuits.

If you are looking at changing your attitudes and behaviors in order to maximize high quality women becoming part of your bedroom here is what I would recommend.

School. Figure out what you want your career to be ASAP and obsess over it for all the years you will be educated, and more. I'd recommend a STEM field and looking towards a good graduate school and getting the necessary requisites to getting there. Read Getting Things Done by David Allen and stick to your goals. Get shit done and check on your progress weekly. Intern, do free work for large companies for experience, freelance, learn outside of school, whatever you need to do. Once you've set up your goals try to internalize and habitualize them (within the first 6 months) so that you aren't burning your willpower unnecessarily.

I say this because even though focusing on your studies and your future wont pay off immediately they will pay dividends to your future self especially when it comes to your love life in your 30's since that is the period of time that your attractiveness as a man is at its peak. You'll have fun in your 20's, but keep in mind that everything you do to improve your 30s will be wise investments.

Health.

Get your testosterone and vitamin D3 levels checked. Then proceed to improve both of them.

Vitamin d3 10,000+ iu Vitamin k2

Eurycoma Longifolia Mucuna Pruiens Magnesium (non aspartic acid)

Eat more -food (3000+ cal with good macro/micro nutrients) -fats (give paleo a look over) Drink more water Get good sleep Sprints Weight lifting

Give special attention to the wieght lifting. Set aside serious time to gym and eating. Get the clothes, set up time, get pre workout mix and protien. Work hard, play hard, rest hard. Your body is a temple.

Yoga/ good stretches on days you're not working out will help out (yoga is great for finding girls).

Girls are just like men when it comes to aesthetics and sexual value. Give yourself a manly body and the girls will be all over it.

R/ Male fashion advice and buy clothes that fit.
Improve your mind and your sense of humor. Read more, play some dual n back, meditate. Play mind games, watch comedians, whatever you need to do. Don't be a dullard.
If you enjoy writing, art, music then throw yourself into it. Not only will it allow you to have improved this over time you work on it, girls love artists.
Get a job or freelance something. Get some income, a way of getting around, and a steady counter to academic pursuits. Having money on hand will keep you from being a mooch and even though you shouldn't pay for girls most times in this day and ago because of entitlement, it is handy to have the freedom to do what you need to do.
Make friends. Be social and introduce yourself to as many people as you can. Keep up with people you like and keep in close contact with positive masculine individuals. Having some bros on hand helps so much. Keep up with everyone as much as you can in person. You can text friends and bros, but keep texting girls you like to a minimum.
Spin plates. Don't get stuck in a relationship. Keep up relations with multiple girls, don't be obsessed over one. Make certain meets with girls you dig who are attracted to you as habitual and familiar as possible.
Wrap your hog
Keep your txt game, sport event knoweldge, school events, greek life, and social media skills up. Again do not obsess but try to make all this data easily available and accessible to yourself to check up on a weekly basis so you know when parties are happening.
Have good logistics. Keep your place clean, get a plant and some good smells/sounds.
Have a life. Hang out with friends, school, job, girls, keep yourself balanced and striving. Don't make the girl the focus of any of your pursuits. DO NOT BECOME OUTCOME DEPENDENT.
Keep your career in mind. Keep up life goals. Prepare to travel. I say this again because of the vast importance of keeping your macro-life in mind. You can only live in the present, but you must learn from the past and plan for the future.
And most importantly: HAVE FUN ARD EXPERIMENT!

No matter what your doing they must be for you or those you hold dear. Enjoy yourself, work hard on yourself, party with your friends, learn every day ect ect. The girl cannot be the focus. Don't let her shit tests sway your frame. Enjoy yourself. You only have an avg. of 25k days to live, don't waste that shit.

On a non alpha side note, keep up your spiritual and mental endeavors. Learn, pray, meditate, take psycadelics, expand your world view, challenge yourself. You have all this time to grow, change, adapt and form your world. Make the best of it. Keep the balance, don't burn out.

TL;DR. Setup your lifestyle in such a way that women are attracted to you and focus on your own personal enjoyment and values over your own lustful desires. Don't let her control you and you will learn game through practice.

A4m1n · 2013-08-23T17:10:08+00:00

Part of being alpha is knowing your limits. Because you can identify your weaknesses, you can then measure and improve on them.

Effort means you tried and fell short. This is a decisive action, not an effort in that direction.

KeziahOrilley · 2013-08-23T17:35:13+00:00

Beta is accepting another's frame. Alpha is defining your own frame. The process of experimenting, failing, learning, practicing, and succeeding is neither alpha nor beta; what matters is whether you're doing it on your own initiative and your own terms, or someone else's.

At your age, here's what you need to know about the red pill:

The way to achieve success with women and in life is to honestly assess your own value and strive to improve it in a broad variety of areas;
A man's physical health and strength matter a lot more to his emotional wellbeing and mating success than is commonly understood;
Women are driven by complex emotional systems which lead their thoughts, words, and actions in conflicting directions, and what a woman says she wants from you is not reliably what she will actually respond positively to;
The pervasive cultural message that being nice (submissive) towards women is the way to get laid, is observably false;
And, human behavior can and should be analyzed using the scientific method.

Putting forth the effort to improve yourself is absolutely not beta. Beta would be not bothering because you trust those who tell you that "you're fine as you are."

captshady · 2013-08-23T21:06:41+00:00

Get yourself a copy of Mastering The Game, and start working.

_whistler · 2013-08-25T16:54:02+00:00

Humility and confidence are not mutually exclusive.

Title	Confusion as a new member.
Author	KeziahOrilley
Upvotes	7
Comments	9
Date	August 23, 2013 4:50 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/1ky9o0/confusion_as_a_new_member/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/confusion-as-a-new-member.138221 https://theredarchive.com/post/138221

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