Constantly imagining fights in my head

FereallyRed · 2019-10-23T17:34:55+00:00

Your ego has you daydreaming.

All it takes is a 120lb junkie with a knife and you're bleeding out on the ground.

Wake up, life isn't physical combat.

drdrunkenheimer · 2019-10-23T18:15:27+00:00

Same exact thing with me but I'm in the USA

It comes from a place of insecurity. If you can actually beat most people up, you shouldn't have to constantly worry about someone picking a fight with you. I would do this if I thought another guy had something I was jealous of (better game, better job, etc) It's a coping mechanism

LSDparade · 2019-10-23T19:23:40+00:00

mostly due to being brown in this racist ass country (UK).

this is rationalisation of your own downfall. One racist individual does not make up the sum of an entire country.

Don't let your trauma cause you to lose the real perspective of the world. There will always be an enemy. Be smart, and more importantly, be responsible for your own success.

MrAnderzon · 2019-10-23T17:28:16+00:00

Do not seek for things to happen the way you want them to; rather, wish that what happens happen the way it happens.

DesperateChemical · 2019-10-23T18:51:55+00:00

If an Englishman stabbed you I'll eat my hat.

mustard5 · 2019-10-23T18:21:58+00:00

Practice being aware of when you are creating mental movies and eventually you can see them coming and get back into the present moment, attending to what is rather than what might be.

[deleted] · 2019-10-23T21:15:22+00:00

Smoke some weed and restructure some thought patterns.

It's normal. Many fighters harbour anger inside of them. Find a way to dump the poison out, so tailor a plan to your individual needs.

fannyfire · 2019-10-23T20:24:00+00:00

I can relate and I’m going to bring this up in my therapy soon. This isn’t an ego issue, this is a coping mechanism. I had a fairly rough childhood and endured getting beaten on a regular basis. I had a brother who was so jealous of me that he would threaten to kill me when I was a child. I remember feeling the knife he would put on my throat. There were days I wanted him to do it. To just put me out of my miserable existence. Unfortunately, he would just beat me instead. It didn’t stop there though. I had bullies on the bus and my brother would allow them to hurt me. And then going into high school, I had a bully every year until my JR. year when I finally snapped. I flipped a bully into a wall and hurt him. I fought every one of my bullies after that and the pain never went away.

I carry a gun for protection now. I can’t sleep at night without thinking someone is going to break into my home and kill me. It takes hours to calm my nerves because I keep thinking I’m going to have to quickly reach for my gun and kill my attacker. What you’re experiencing is anxiety and it’s real. It doesn’t matter how big you get, what skills you learn, how many guns you own or the size of the knife in your pocket. You will never feel safe. You will always look over your shoulder and the fear is real.

I hope you seek out some help. I know exactly what you’re going through and it’s agonizing to live this way.

IcyBear7 · 2019-10-23T20:31:45+00:00

I can relate and i def know the anger ure talkin about. It does feel like anyone could start shit with u at any moment.

proactive-defense · 2019-10-23T20:48:58+00:00

So it IS good to know at any moment how to control a situation.

But the anger or whatever addictive emotion associated with it is not useful, and it isn’t actually linked. You can objectively know how to fight those around you without emotion. Just need to be aware of it and slowly induce change. Catch yourself.

ili_lost_MC · 2019-10-23T20:14:18+00:00

Racist ass country, lol. Then fuck off back to africa, see how other brown people treat each other there.

empatheticapathetic · 2019-10-23T18:39:06+00:00

Bro similar situation with race and experiences. I have had a hostile energy about me for a long while (reading TRP has helped me protect myself but also put up further huge barriers) but its finally slowly tapering off.

Make more friends. Be grateful for what you have and really make the most of the positive experiences that are available to you. The EC here suggested stoicism which is great, but you should really delve into it to truly find some peace.

Have more positive experiences (easier said than done) but basically be more open to new experiences and new people, and definitely travel outside of the UK. Last year after getting home to the UK after a holiday I (re)noticed how unnecessarily hostile everyone was to each other, in the hopes of proving they had higher status. It was sad to see and it's a shame a lot of people are too concerned with such irrelevance and think this is the way to happiness. Ultimately they are scared and hostile themselves.

Accept it may take time as well. My hostility ultimately was due to me not having enough friends i could truly be myself with. I could keep going with suggestions but i'm sure you'll pick up the general idea i'm trying to explain here.

MR_SKINNYPENIS69 · 2019-10-24T06:43:39+00:00

They have a place for people who act on those thoughts. It's called prison. Reign it in. If you haven't already figured it out, these thoughts probably come from a place of fear.

Also, beaten because you're brown in the UK? Are you Pakistani or what?

[deleted] · 2019-10-24T15:47:09+00:00

M-29 recoilless gun with an M-388 round

Patches0wholahan · 2019-10-23T18:17:38+00:00

Lol Ok billy bad ass.

First off, get over yourself. That chip on your shoulder is why someone not only bullied and beat you, but stabbed you.

Second, the UK is a racist ass county? Lol maybe you’re a sensitive little bitch.

I wouldn’t bet on you to fight your way out of a wet paper bag.

[deleted] · 2019-10-23T18:22:24+00:00

Try cognitive behavioural therapy. They’ll teach you to control intrusive thoughts. One thing you can do is get a rubber band and have it around you wrist, every time you have one of these thoughts snap it and have a default positive thought, like picturing you dog or something.

Title	Constantly imagining fights in my head
Author	trp369
Upvotes	1
Comments	55
Date	October 23, 2019 4:55 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/dm24ru/constantly_imagining_fights_in_my_head/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/constantly-imagining-fights-in-my-head.292415 https://theredarchive.com/post/292415

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