Convey message without mate guarding?

boy_named_su · 2018-10-21T00:34:40+00:00

Hard next if it violates something deep down for you. 1 week soft next otherwise. Zero comms even if she contacts you

She knows it isn't ok. She just thinks you're a bitch

Next relationship, make sure she understands the reason why this one ended

CalvinRichland · 2018-10-21T00:13:37+00:00

"I don't date women that go on dates with other men"

She will make her choice and if it's not acceptable to you then follow the fuck through.

Saberinbed · 2018-10-21T00:58:20+00:00

She is going to go out with dude with or without you saying anything. Take it from someone with experience. If a girl wants to cheat on you, she will no matter how you act. I’m guessing this girl is in her early 20s? If so, there is nothing you can do but to just act like you don’t give a shit, and apply some dread game. Have a backup chick in case things go south before you try to dread her.

pitpothotlot · 2018-10-21T01:06:03+00:00

Tell her.

When I was severely BP beta, I had a girlfriend who would hang out with her best guy friend and went to see a movie with him.

I thought "I don't wanna be a controlling asshole!" And she was fucking this guy and left me for him. It was pathetic of me.

If it doesn't sit right with you, and you shut up about it because of some "it's controlling to not let your girlfriend go on romantic dates with other guys" conditioning, then you're being dishonest with yourself and losing frame.

Tell her that you don't date girls who do this shit, but don't try to physically stop her or anything. If she goes, you next her.

h0ndaboy · 2018-10-21T01:44:44+00:00

Does she pay for your bills or do things for you that you can do yourself? Yes? Leave Her
Does she hang out with other guys one on one all knowing she is already in an LTR? Yes? Leave Her
Do you feel the need to mate guard? Yes? Leave Her

These questions should never have to occur either as a single man or in a relationship. You have the power to control what decides your happiness and success. Mate guarding shows that one has a scarcity mindset. "If she leaves, where am i gonna get X or Y" If she leaves, so what? Girls come and go. It's your job to keep yourself content, and it's her job to keep herself out of situations where mistakes can me made. If a certain individual invites her out, it's her decision whether to say no or not. A girl in an LTR has no real need to be spending time with other men when she already has one in front of her. Same goes for a guy doesn't need to be in an LTR with a woman that spends one on one time with other guys that she isn't related to.

Terdmuffin · 2018-10-21T03:29:07+00:00

IMO most issues like this happen because you don't nip it in the bud. If you have a history of being okay with type of shit from your partner she's going to expect it. By the time you make a chick your ltr she should already know without a doubt that you're not okay with this type of behavior. A lot of the advice here is to handle it passively aggressively: Cancel plans, ignore for a week, get up and leave for a few hours and hide where you were, etc. Just tell her straight up you expect your girlfriend not to do things like this.

10211799107 · 2018-10-21T04:25:14+00:00

You have your advice from users. Stop being a pussy and end it now. Bonus if you can do it and not give her a reason. She'll want comfort and a reason but if you go dark and block her she'll forecer wonder what the fuck.
She doeant respect you. And she never will. You lost. So end it and no explaning.

Woke_Normie · 2018-10-21T00:25:13+00:00

thats majorly fucked bro. no legit girl would go out with another guy solo...

is she getting ready to monkey branch?

even girls going out solo with gay guys is a problem because they cause drama and could be straight on the down low or promote her to slut around

mrpthrowa · 2018-10-21T10:03:26+00:00

Ignore all of the nonsense about telling her

You have standards, your job is to vet whether a girl lives up to those standards.

It is not to let her know what those standards are

zuhbooze · 2018-10-21T10:10:54+00:00

Flip it on her.

"You're a big girl, big girls make their own decisions, have fun."

If you're bothered by it (which I sense) then hard next. She did you a favor.

Title	Convey message without mate guarding?
Author	pitpothotlot
Upvotes	1
Comments	22
Date	October 21, 2018 12:09 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/9pz5mh/convey_message_without_mate_guarding/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/convey-message-without-mate-guarding.135266 https://theredarchive.com/post/135266

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