This chick is a labour and delivery nurse. Her profile specifically says she loves witty -- figured I would send this message.... thoughts on it?

Subject: An event horizon--APGAR score = 10!!!

I have been told by numerous female "professionals" that my APGAR is 10!! Naturally, I am looking for someone of a similar demographic. Assessing your situation thus far, your Appearance gets 2--bonus points would be given for the hair if I could; Activity (muscle tone) also gets a 2--unless you are a closet ……; and Pulse (heartbeat), Grimace (reflex) and Respiration (breathing) I am unsure at this point. So at this point in time, I am only confident giving you a guaranteed APGAR of 4. I propose you book an appointment so I can check the remaining vitals. I have availability Wednesday evening at 7:30pm and Thursday evening 7:00pm. If these times do not work please let me know and I will get my secretary to make alternate arrangements.

Once confirmed, location and details will follow!