So i wrote this post about my oneitis a couple of days ago and since then i've been going in the same insane loop. I was supposed to spend christmas and new years with her and i blocked her everywhere just so i don't see anything of hers. Thing is i've been mindfucking myself for years that this girl actually liked me ( even though she had a boyfriend for the longest period ) and even when she went single she refused me.

The reason i'm actually going insane is because i keep thinking if she really did only want my attention ...because what she did was different then what she said. She kept saying we should stop contacting each other and then initiated contact weeks or months later , he kept getting jealous when i was talking to her friends and shit or other girls , she kept checking my youtube channel and adding songs that i've been updating to my playlists....

I'm actually going insane here thinking that i had a shot with this girl and i somehow fucked it up by being too desperate. And now she's all i think about 24/7....please help.

I'm not in a good mindset to actually start working on girls and shit and i've been single for 3 years just having some plates here and there that never satisfied me ....but this one even though we only kissed once ....has made me go mad...