Here's the deal guys. I'm currently in a year long LTR. It's going alright. She's a decent girl, great in bed, has future plans, treats me well. We don't exactly live right next to each other, we do talk on the phone and text a good bit, and see each other a good amount. I'm older than her by 5 years. I am out of college and in a great field of work. When we met she was smitten, because I'm older and settled in my ways, good looking, good job/career. She was always so excited to tell me everything, talk, share with me, the usual falling for someone stuff.

Here's where it goes slightly off. A few months ago I announced to her that a would be changing from career path A to career B. These careers are night and day difference, which will require 2-3 more years of college. I plan to work during these years and pay for it myself. She knows of my passion for the subject matter of B. She didn't know I never knew exactly what I wanted to do with my life until after college, and have been battling with it since.

Looking back it was at this point where she began to lose respect. Stopped sharing as much about her life, friends, whatever. Didn't act as respectful as the first however many months. She doesn't call with the same frequency, as a new flame will always call multiple times per day, the same excitement in her voice. You know that excitement you can see and hear when a lady is true lovin. She forgets things that a girl in love doesn't forget, now. We had a few arguments because, well, I basically felt like I wasn't as involved in her life anymore and she didn't see that she wasn't acting the same. These arguments caused quite the tension in the relationship. I claim full responsibility for acting like a bitch at times.

We are still together, sometimes we are good, sometimes not. It's lack of respect you see, and it drives me absolutely mad. At least compared to how the majority of this first year has gone.

You see, what happened was, when I revealed to her my plan she wasn't happy. That totally changed her view of me, this older working guy, who knew where he was going in life. Who had this plan and direction and had it all figured out. Women love that shit. And we as men know that's what we are supposed to be. The drive towards my passion doesn't matter at all compared to where I currently stand. Her view of me and respect for me went to shit, just like that.

So you see where it is actually my fault, because I'm not the man (yet) she thought I was. Even though I will be working towards something I am truly passionate about, that isn't what matters. What matters is your status. Your money. Your direction. Your guidance for her. She isn't to blame, you can see how I messed up. I was never intentionally deceitful. It was something that had been weighing on my mind for a couple of years now. This career change, the fact that I haven't been set with a goal (which she now realizes), totally shocked her. And you see how her respect and admiration almost has disappeared. She is now on my level, whereas before she was looking up. She lost her comfort of knowing she was with that man.

We talked about it today. I brought up, very calmly, many of these points. I wasn't offensive and I took full responsibility for not being exactly as she thought. For not being that man. How could I be mad? It's nature. She essentially agreed, or did not argue with any of it, and some of the words and phrases I used were hers. She's been very nice since. Just to update you.

My question to you, TRP, is how do I get it back. How do I regain her trust and respect? How do I show her (besides showing my dedication to this new career, while also working my ass off to support myself through it) that I am a man with a plan? That I have that same drive and direction she always thought I had.