How can I fix myself?

0x47 · 2015-02-03T20:54:27+00:00

Boo hoo, everyone please feel sorry for me. Get a grip of yourself! Most of these things are so easy to fix and yet you don't seem to realise due to low self-esteem.

Glasses = Contacts.
They're supposedly living the pinnacle of life = They're not, you're just making assumptions.
Unattractive face = You say you lift so start cutting.
I have no chance with women = By the sounds of things you don't even socialise.

tombreck2 · 2015-02-03T21:32:31+00:00

Read Models by Manson; it will change your life perspective

smokingtransistor · 2015-02-03T22:33:18+00:00

Go do some martial arts and keep to it through all hardships (no matter what ! this is important). Try something that actually involve some sort of sparring as well as discipline+philosophy (something japanese maybe).. That's the easiest and fastest route that i can think of for someone to change fast.

It changed me. I will not say what art i profess, because it's really not that common, but it made me think a lot and modeled me into a better person: i cope well with stress/insults/hardships, i became less offended and violent, i have more self confidence etc. (i could see the effects in about one year).

Start reading books, stuff that helps you think rationally (pm me if you want some suggestions) - non-fiction books if you can. Fiction dwells in an unreal world (though there is fiction that should be read).

Try new things see if you like them or not (be true to yourself). Try speaking to people and be genuinely interested in them (imagine yourself in their situations and what would you do, ask sincere questions, try to understand that people are similar yet different. Each of us has needs; wants to be happy, wants to have friends and generally would not be evil or bad, and if they do it is not your fault (in most of the times). Learn to fail and to be wrong if you are (this is hard ! really hard! ). Be friendly because people have a lot of problems and you can help them with a smile.

Do sports! I mean it: do sports ! Eat healthy !

Find a thing you like and pursue that, find people online that have similar thoughts/interests.

Be fair, but be tough when needed and assert your surroundings so you know when to restrain or do something. Keep in mind what needs to be done, not what you want.

Be clean with your clothes/body/surroundings and do that regularly. Get a good job and dress good but not pretentious (clean good shoes are important though - they give a lot of signs about you ;) )

Everything is in your own hands. Everything!

And good luck with your change !

oldredder · 2015-02-04T06:23:53+00:00

" My only contact with girls is escorts. I have no motivation to work and I am coasting towards the end of my engineering degree."

How is this possible??

I was an escort driver. They charged 150/30 min or 200/hr. Not working = no money. How are you managing this? Big inheritance?

"I wear glasses, have Arab parents, and probably have an unattractive face"

Depends. There's ugly people of every race but there's manly, good-genes men of each race too and generally if I look hard enough I can find visual examples of hot women of any race I can think of, even Arab. Very hard pushing it for India - I find most Indian women repulsive in appearance - but there's still a few who truly are hot gems and their genetics, I can tell, would be ideal for mating so that's what's attractive to me at a core level without considering things of intellectual review like personality, up-bringing, red-flag factors, etc.

"but I hate being around people at university be cause they're supposedly living the pinnacle.of life."

There's a shit-ton of people who will have more money or better life than any of us. You can't let yourself care about it. Just measure your own gains & efficiency in getting them, risk & risk-seeking / risk-aversion, how it works, how it doesn't in your life.

You need those social skills.

Title	How can I fix myself?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	3
Comments	6
Date	February 3, 2015 8:37 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/2uobtx/how_can_i_fix_myself/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-can-i-fix-myself.192173 https://theredarchive.com/post/192173

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