In short, there is no in between with me.

It is either I shut off 100 percent, or I get into a shouting match and lose my shit. Reason being is, I have become accustomed to either lying entirely to avoid confrontation, or hold everything inside until I feel it is necessary to start communicating and it comes off as extremely passive.

This is learned behavior from growing up with Baptist Christian parents who believe if you drink you are an alcoholic, if you have sex, it is a sin, and you have to get married before you move out.

Any tips on how to become more assertive and become a better communicator? I overall lack the patience I need -- because I typically cut people off altogether with zero explanation which I think is a bad way to live life.