How do I not let this stuff bother me?

jb_trp · 2017-10-19T17:07:04+00:00

TRP can be really funny. People take things way too far sometimes. It's like, "Yo bro, she didn't go back to your place and fuck you on the first date? You're a fucking beta orbiter and need to next that bitch!" and then they wonder why all the chicks they date can't be trusted at all. Well... You can't have it both ways, right?

I like to think of AWALT as a spectrum. Some chicks fall on the far ends of the spectrum (total prudes <-------> total sluts), with a lot falling in between. And if you date a really slutty chick, don't be shocked if she does really promiscuous things. I believe in AWALT, not because every chick is going to cheat, lie, etc. over every possible chance, but because you always have to think there is a possibility of a girl doing that... No matter how "good" of a girl you think she is. It's the same thing as "treat every gun as though it is loaded."

Just be smart. No person is above cheating... It's more important to look at the boundaries a girl sets with other men. Because even good people (read: "good" women) can become cheaters if they have shitty boundaries. If a girl starts hiding her phone, acting weird, or whatever... Then you should listen to your intuition.

But if you are dating a good looking girl, of course she's going to get attention (i.e. Instagram likes/comments) from dudes. But what she does with those responses communicates to you everything you need to know about her. It's fine is she "likes" someone's comment. It's not fine is she exchanges snapchats with this random dude and starts privately messaging him. Right? So... Don't be paranoid, just be aware and always be willing to walk away if a girl is not worth it.

1NV0K3R · 2017-10-19T17:18:53+00:00

The fact your spazzing out on this shit means you shouldn't even be in an LTR in the first palce.

Read the side bar, lift, maintain abundance mentality.

But I can tell you how to deal with it, you won't like the answer though.

[spoiler]Answer: Stop giving a shit.[/spoiler]

frontiermarine · 2017-10-19T17:42:16+00:00

Work on your insecurities before diving into a relationship, women hate when a guy is needy & insecure,and if you continue to act like this she's going to dump your ass. Have an abundant mentality ,even if she cheats on you,there's plenty of other women out there

quicklogaccount · 2017-10-19T19:28:30+00:00

Don't worry, you'll be alright in no time.

Your confidence was based on naivety and your partner's behaviors man. Things never went south for you so you never bothered considering the possibility. For some reason (why?) you ended up here and you were forced to look at how things could go wrong and you're obsessing now. It's cool, it was bound to happen.

Give it some time and you'll root your confidence in the certainty that you won't let yourself get played or screwed instead of in your partner not screwing you. Then you'll be cool, paranoia will go away and won't ever come back again.

Time and time again I say something here, don't be cheat-o-phobic. Her cheating doesn't hurt you, it hurts your relationship. Usually guys develop such a strong dependence on their partner that they're rather taking this damage upon themselves to preserve the relationship. Just don't take it upon yourself, let the relationship take whatever blows she gives, whether cheating or just plain shitty behavior, and you'll be alright.
If you keep worrying about it, you'll end up caught in a limbo. Either you'll try to un-RP yourself and make a forcefully blind eye to women being women because it hurts you, or you'll grow into a sacred guy that needs to put every emotional barrier he can come up with between him and chicks because he's dead afraid to get hurt.

mrHappyPotatoe · 2017-10-19T20:01:33+00:00

Its good to keep nurturing healthy doze of paranoia.

Title	How do I not let this stuff bother me?
Author	CopperySweep
Upvotes	0
Comments	10
Date	October 19, 2017 4:56 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/77fqe2/how_do_i_not_let_this_stuff_bother_me/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-do-i-not-let-this-stuff-bother-me.116589 https://theredarchive.com/post/116589

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