A quality I've noticed in guys that are naturals with women is that they have a very strong inner frame that doesn't seem to be tied to their outer value. For example, a guy may be average looking, not wealthy, etc. but has a very strong frame and inner confidence (truly believes he is the prize). On the other hand I've seen a lot of guys that work very hard in school, on their careers, etc. but have very weak frame and are insecure. This has led me to the point that I think to an extent self-improvement is helpful but it doesn't really build that inner confidence. Ideally, you should be able to accept yourself the way you are today and be confident with it rather than correlate confidence to your outer value (wealth, fitness, etc.). Over the past year, I've been lifting hard and have developed a good physique but I find that inner frame/confidence to still be lacking. What would you recommend doing to help build that inner confidence/frame that isn't tied to outer value? I've read that affirmations can help but how would I use these? Are there any good books on this I should read?