New member here. I've been a lurker for a while, this is actually my second account. I deleted the first when I realized I had a lot more work and reading to do, and a lot less questions I should be asking, but I feel like I have figured out a major shortcoming of mine and I can't think of a better place to come for help since I have no idea how to solve it on my own.

TL;DR - I have no idea how to escalate with women because I have been a social outcast for pretty much my entire life, and would like to be at least pointed in the right direction.

But before I get to my inquiry, a little bit of background about myself so y'all know what you're working with: I am a six foot tall, 205 pound 20 year old bodybuilding incel virgin. Honestly, I fit the profile of your typical school shooter pretty well; the bullying began immediately after I started public school (first day of kindergarten, I still remember it vividly), and as a result, I've been an outcast my entire life and have had a very hard time making the few friends that I have/had. To make things worse, my dad got a job that required him to be gone almost all the time when I was about 11, so I was raised through my formative years almost completely by my mother, and we all know how much that can fuck up a young man. My entire life I have felt completely alone, never feeling a true connection with even one single human being that isn't family. Obviously girls didn't want anything to do with me either since most guys hated me for one reason or another, and I didn't think I really wanted to anything to do with them either since every even remotely sexual behavior/thought I ever had was immediately shamed by my mother and sister. The ones that have taken a chance with me quickly realize that I have no idea what I'm doing when it comes to relationships with women and how fucked up I am emotionally. I started lifting weights about right after I hit puberty to gain weight for hockey and football, and got into bodybuilding at a very early age because of my non-existant self-esteem. I also started isolating myself from people at around that time (probably another reason I love lifting so much); putting myself around people in the first place made them not like me just because of who I am, trying to be a supplicating beta pushover got me stepped on and treated like shit (literally no one gave a shit about me), and lashing out (not even physically,verbally) made them think I am a psycho. So it's safe to say, I have kept to myself as much as possible for almost the last ten years.

Anyway, since I've gone off to school I thought my luck would change if I met girls that had no idea of my history. And honestly, getting girls interested is not that hard at all, I'm taller-than-average, my family is decently well-off, no chronic acne/balding/oversized or asymmetrical facial features, and I'm pretty fucking jacked for a 20 year old that isn't on any gear yet. I have no problem noticing when a girl is interested in me and talking/hanging out for a few weeks if I find them attractive, but usually about the month mark they lose interest completely. I have VERY minimal experience with women outside of a professional/academic setting, which makes me think my problem is that I have no idea how to escalate past even having a conversation with a girl that I can tell is interested in me.

Girls/relationships mean nothing at all to me whatsoever, so I guess if nothing constructive is produced by my question that's fine, but I can't help but feel like a defective fuck-up for not having a clue how to even get to first base with a girl. I will never need a woman for anything, but it would be nice to be able to actually prove to myself I can get hot girls in my bed whenever I want, if I want, instead of just telling people I can and playing it off like I don't want to have sex with girls.

EDIT: fixed a couple spelling errors