I'm not new to TRP but I'm finally at the beginning of making some big changes in my life. I've been here for a few years, but I've been lazy and unwilling to change. I smoke a lot of pot, don't work very hard at my job, and am just generally lazy. I'm sick of it. I'm sick of the way I've acted, and I'm actually really pissed off at myself.

I came off a bad breakup 3 years ago, and honestly I'm still not completely over it. I think it's because I haven't made any progress in my own life to become a better person. I'm almost glad I never saw my ex again. I'd hate for her to know I'm still exactly the fucking same and haven't made any strides to be more of a man.

I already dress well, have great hygiene, always try to look my best. I don't have an issue in that area at all. But I really need to give up the weed, it's been taking over my life, and I think making me a little antisocial. My real problem with women is that I have no clue what to say half the time. And it's not just with girls, even with guy friends I have a hard time injecting myself into the conversation. I see my friends approaching women and I always wonder "what the hell are they even saying?". I don't approach at all because I'm so self conscious of having nothing to say, or saying something stupid, or just being generally boring and asking the same questions everyone does. I think the weed has made me so inwardly focused, that I struggle to connect with people sometimes. I'm hoping quitting will help this a little.

What can I do to be more social? I want to be the guy that's fun to be around and always has something good to say. But as it is now, I'm a little boring and certainly nowhere near being the life of the party. Any help appreciated.