Hello

I have been on the red pill since 2018 and the more I indulge in consuming eye-opening information the bigger my cynicism becomes.

I went from a stupid, naiive, weak and broke 18 year old to a well-put together, fit, healthy and focused 21 year old with an LTR.

At first, I was (like many others here) motivated by pussy. I have primarily consumed Information about how to be a attractive to women.
Notable sources of information :
1-the entire sidebar
2-the rational male
3-the game
4-the book of pook
and many other books

Then my focus shifted to money and i started consuming information regarding money :

Notable sources :
1-Rich dad poor dad
2-The millionaire fastlane
3-the richest man in babylon
4-total money makeover
and many other books

After getting a gf and having a decent amount of money (for my age and situation) my focus shifted toward political theory and philosophy and at this point I can't help but think how meaningless money and pussy is.

Notable sources :
1-the way of men
2-bronze age mindset
3-might is right
4-the prince
and many other books
I have lost interest in getting laid a lot, I have lost interest in making big amounts of money. All I am interested in now is self-fullfillment. I want to become the man my ancestors would be proud of. like bob denard or hiroo onoda. I want to join fighting clubs, the military, maybe a criminal organization. I want to make fun of people on the internet.

This "fuck a lot of bitches, make tons of money and be shredded bro" mantra is not fullfilling anymore.

And it makes matters worse to notice that success in these things doesnt neccesarily follow a certain pattern. I know a 165 cm, chubby and dumb dude who has basically fucked half of all existing 10's and 9's in my city. And almost all of the dudes that I know of who are financially successfull (I am talking six figure incomes) havent built their wealth by 100% abiding the law. I know many shredded dudes in the gym who built their bodies by doing things I thought were absolutely wrong (like smoking, consuming too much sugar, hitting the gym every day, no dieting.....etc)

I am slowly beginning to understand the character of tyler durden.

So all I am asking is : has anyone here ever gone through this stage ? IS it a stage at all ? what should I do to numb those weird thoughts ? is more pussy or money going to solve this ? is "enjoying the decline" the only thing worth doing ?