I need some help - date tonight

MrBowlfish · 2016-09-02T15:14:49+00:00

You need outcome independence. Badly. You already have way too much riding on this chick and you've never even met. She is bound to disappoint you. Lower your expectations. We all know this is a numbers game and most dates don't lead to anything spectacular. Just look at it as fun and something to do to amuse yourself. Detach...

McCoop_ · 2016-09-02T15:26:40+00:00

I've been on a date in a place of weakness, desperation, and self doubt and it is a bad vibe to give off on a date. If you spend the whole date trying to justify and prove how great you to force an outcome it can ruin her perception of you. Be confident with yourself have her do most of the talking without grilling or interrogating her. A good sense of humour and teasing can be a nice way to ease the mood.

Try to find natural ways to break the touch boundary and build comfort. You can start the date with a hug, cheek kiss greeting, or a handshake depending on what's appropriate. Either way, go for it confidently; a firm handshake, a hug without hesitation. Obviously don't hold the hug or hand more than normal. A hug gives her a chance to smell your lightly applied cologne or scent (people shouldn't smell you before they see you). Smelling nice is infinitely better than smelling anything like BO or dirty laundry.

Touching her arm with a pat or short light grasp after teasing her is more natural and involves minimal acting or creativity.

One fun way to start touching is to offer to read her palm and make playful guesses about her past and future. Hold her palm in one hand and gently move your finger along the grooves and speak softly like a whisper. Obviously your predictions are playful and throw in a cheeky grin if you tease her. This one is a risky play if you are not comfortable in the interaction, however comfort comes through experience. You landed this date you will land another.

Sometimes there is no physical escalation but you talk about things for her to think about and allow her to get herself in the mood.

She may not be receptive to your touch in general, which is a good indicator that things aren't going anywhere. If she avoids a kiss or a sexual touch it might be a closed door or she wants to take it a bit slower. Try to read her body language to make a proper assessment.

No matter what happens, you pulled a date and you will learn things for the next one; it's a win-win. Good luck!

[deleted] · 2016-09-02T17:26:35+00:00

Go fuck it up, do it again 10 times. Then worry about f closing.

Bush leagues before you go pro

[deleted] · 2016-09-02T15:06:10+00:00

Wow you're overthinking it. Do not meet for coffee.

Meet for drinks after 8pm and apply kino there. Should work out if you're not a nervous wreck

VasiliyZaitzev · 2016-09-02T15:37:21+00:00

Whatever you do, don't hump her leg at the coffee shop, no matter how much you want to.

SexySmexxy · 2016-09-02T19:11:03+00:00

I'm only 21 but I hate going for drinks. After enough time it gets so boring I could shoot myself.

Do something fun, and just relax. You're both nervous, lead the date.

SoRedSuchAlpha · 2016-09-02T20:25:06+00:00

How do I make sure that she is not just dinner whore and I am not getting betabucked by paying for drinks and dinner.

Don't pay for dinner. There is no other way to be sure.

Title	I need some help - date tonight
Author	Hue85
Upvotes	1
Comments	8
Date	September 2, 2016 2:54 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/50tm6e/i_need_some_help_date_tonight/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/i-need-some-help-date-tonight.110712 https://theredarchive.com/post/110712

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