I was wondering if I could collect tips from you gentlemen on developing an unshakeable inner game and core belief system. I have read over a few threads now and I have a bit of a list of what I have internalized and some realizations about myself. There are quite a few things that I just don't have locked in. I don't know where these mental blocks are coming from. I just want to do my best in making sure I become the best version of myself and I do not slow down for fucking anything. No more loser victim mentality, no more excuses. I will continue to crush this. Every. Fucking. Day. Until I get it.

These are my current mental blocks:

  • I know I'm of value and have lots to offer the world. However, I don't know how to share this with the world sometimes.

  • I know that I am above average in looks. However, I don't act like it. I especially don't feel it.

  • I love to joke around but I notice that not everyone gets my jokes sometimes so I find that I'm often laughing the hardest.

  • I try to make friends but it honestly feels forced sometimes. I'd say it's 50/50. Especially when it comes to girls. I like to have some girls as friends to add to my social circle but I find that these are the hardest types of friends for me to make for whatever reason. I have no issues making guy friends.

  • I look a lot tougher than I honestly am. I am covered in tattoos, quite jacked, mma and contact sports my whole life, tall and tan skinned. I feel like my personality or internal vibe doesn't match my appearance and I'm not sure how to make this congruent. People expect a tough guy, but I'm actually quite caring about others and honestly, I'm probably too sensitive.

  • I don't necessarily care what others think, unless they are people I interact with often. This wasn't always the case, I used to just do me and worry about me. Beta mentality swallowed me whole. A stranger on the street means dick to me, but my buddies or anyone that I see often or even regularly in public, seems to matter.

  • I have recently overcome depression and the biggest issue I face with this new phase of my life is that I'm not quite sure who I am as a person. I associated depression with who I was as a person for years. I know now that I am not this mental illness. It was something I had, something affecting me. I do not suffer from it anymore, but I also don't know who I am without it. I feel tremendously lighter mentally and spiritually but I think I need to narrow down what makes me, me.

  • I often find myself dwelling on negative shit when I'm alone. I'm not quite sure if this means there are things internally I'm not facing or if this means I just have a toxic though process. I need to correct this.

  • When I feel good, I feel fucking great. I carry that vibe everywhere I go. When I feel bad, I feel fucking awful. I also carry this vibe everywhere I go.

It's not too easy for me to admit these things about myself but I do know you guys will take what is written and help sort me out. Sometimes you need to bite the bullet and accept where you are at in order to get to qhere you want to go and that's exactly what I'm going to do. Regardless of how much it sucks to hear and how hard it'll be.

Thanks for your time fellas. I appreciate it greatly even if you can't send any tips my way. I know I'm taking a lot of value but one day I will be able to give it back and that's a promise.