Love, can it happen?

mordanus · 2013-09-03T07:44:00+00:00

You want to stop playing the alpha game? What do you think attracted her to you in the first place?

iKill_eu · 2013-09-03T08:24:46+00:00

as someone who fell out of a long LTR because I stopped running game as heavily and she "lost feelings"....

never fucking stop gaming. you can be caring and run game at the same time.

[deleted] · 2013-09-03T14:09:32+00:00

It isn't about the sex though, I feel emotionally attached to her, and I am sick of playing the alpha aloof, caring douche game.

And as soon as you stop, she's gone. Try it for two weeks. The first week, she'll love it. The second week, she'll start distancing herself.

[deleted] · 2013-09-04T03:31:17+00:00

Listen OP, this asktrp subreddit is full of absolutely bullshit advice. You need to think for yourself here. Many people in this sub have been burned by women because they lack the skills of a superior man and the ability to keep a woman interested. It is a perfectly normal and natural thing for a man to love a woman, do not think that it is emotionally unhealthy to do so, you are biologically programmed to want to settle down with a woman (else how would you ever father and protect her children). You have feelings for this girl? That is perfectly fine, what matters is how you respond to those feelings. DO NOT put her on a pedestal. DO NOT give her all of your attention, and DO NOT start treating her like a princess.

What is important here is that you realize men and women love differently. You seem to understand enough redpill to realize this, even if you can't verbalize it. You don't treat her like a princess, you remain aloof, you game her. What you are doing is fueling the fires of attraction, this is a man's job in a loving relationship (women on the other hand, have a different job, but that is beside the point).

What is important here is that you realize your job in your relationship with this girl and you see through the "omg I'm so in love in with this girl I think she's the one" bullshit. This girl is still like any other girl and you need to keep that mindset, but if you love her, there is nothing wrong with that. What you need to do is keep her interested if you want something long term. How do you keep her interested? Well you already know the answer to that or you wouldn't be banging her in the first place.

You do not need to talk about making anything official with her, girls don't need labels, this is a male perspective and a common misconception. Men want to organize, quantify, and label everything. Women just want to feel like things are in order. If her feelings toward you are reciprocated (and keep in mind what I said, women love differently than men), then you more or less already are in a relationship. It really doesn't matter what the hell you call it, you are seeing each other more than once a week and you are sexual with one another, it is a relationship.

Remember, it is important that you DO your job as a man in the relationship or else you will suffer the consequences of any man who doesn't perform his job adequately (you get fired). Relationships are hard work for a man, and they often don't bring benefits like society would lead us to believe (a relationship is for the benefit of woman, not man. The key is to ask yourself if this woman is worth your time and energy to benefit from a relationship with you!! Most are not).

I'm going to spell this out for you: You say this woman is very feminine, that means she is attracted to very masculine men, you either retain your masculine frame or you lose her. Simple as that, and no amount of love (on your end or hers) will change that. You simply must do the things you need to do in order to keep her interested. If this sounds like too much for you, then maybe "being in love" isn't something you're cut out for, or maybe you need to seek out a slightly more masculine woman, whom you don't need to game as much.

md619 · 2013-09-03T04:47:45+00:00

Maybe all girls are the same, but this one is different

ONEitis alert.

My advice? Quit being a bitch and enjoy the ride.

Phyrd · 2013-09-03T05:03:34+00:00

I think you know what you need to do.

ML00211 · 2013-09-03T08:31:23+00:00

Love can happen. It can happen with your first lay or with your 50th. I'd say its a lot more likely to happen closer to your first than your 50th, but that's just me.

Anyway, I'm a bit confused by your writing. So you like her and you've been together for 4 months and she doesn't want a relationship, plus you haven't made her cum? I think the writing is on the wall.

I made my virgin gf come the very first time we had sex so its not inexperience, its emotional readiness that lets her come.

Talking won't get you anywhere so my advice is to keep her around and start being more aloof and go out with other girls.

UnluckyPenguin · 2013-09-03T17:53:47+00:00

No one should have one-itis for a girl that has not yet committed to them (and vice versa).

Make your true feelings known and if she reciprocates then great! If not, then no harm done and you cut it off before you get too emotionally involved. Who knows, maybe she will come chasing after you when she realized that the relationship was on the edge of falling apart.

I'm in the same position right now. I have the same mindset that I can get other girls but something about this girl is different. I told her how I felt earlier but she thought we should wait before she becomes my girlfriend. But I also pretend to be less interested in her than she is in me.

Good luck friend :)

Title	Love, can it happen?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	4
Comments	20
Date	September 3, 2013 4:31 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/1lmhve/love_can_it_happen/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/love-can-it-happen.196505 https://theredarchive.com/post/196505

Comments