Spent my 20s traveling around the world, partying and teaching English. Those were easily my best days. Had a great social life, met lots of broads, and was generally happy and felt like life had some momentum and was building towards some crescendo.

I started to get insecure about my career and work situation. I didn't want to be an English teacher forever and decided to go back to my country to get professional life sorted out. It took a little while, but I eventually did it. Now I am here working a job that requires little effort and getting paid a lot more than I should. Yet I am unfulfilled.

Biggest disappoint has been friends. Since returning, I feel like I have outgrown many of them. A lot of them have fallen by the wayside. Some got married and had kids, other got married and wrecked in divorces. Some fell to addictions and Alcoholism. Its sad to see and a bit depressing. I feel a lot of them deserve better lives than what was handed out to them. I have trouble connecting with them or anyone else these days, and it gets lonely.

I can still get girls when I put myself out there or try. I am decently attractive and usually get mistaken for much younger than I actually am. I just don't really have much of a desire to do it. I feel like the quality of women have gone down so far, that its not worth the time, energy and emotional investment. My last two plates were early twenties, definitely attractive but both batshit crazy. It has me totally turned off from the dating scene here. I also get self conscious sometimes about my age and the fact that I am still int he dating scene. Im not looking for a life partner or anything, but I would think I would have found something more stable at my age. Usually I just say fuck it and wait until I get horny enough and get a hooker lol.

Work has taken me around the country the past few years, and I am lucky enough to have a job that went remote during covid. I am currently living in a city that I don't have any connection to in a pretty unfriendly roommate situation. Something came up where I have to get out of my current apartment and I decided to go back to my hometown for a bit.

I am trying to figure out where to take my life from here and sort out what my next set of goals should be. I am thinking of doing some traveling - a working holiday of sorts where I can maybe clear my head and find some inspiration. Luckily, I work in a field where to is very plausible to go remote full time and I think I will start seriously considering living overseas again. I am hoping being out of the toxic environment of my home country would also ring out the desire to start dating and pursuing women again, open my mind a little to forming new friendships and give me some clarity on how I want to live in the future. Being a mid-30s single worker drone was never what I set out to do.

Anyone out there who had to start over at this age, or made some drastic change? Will moving actually help me get to feeling lie my old self or am I just distracting myself from some internal issues that have to be addressed? Also, can life get better from here, ro have I hit my peak and will slowly start to fade out? Any input would be appreciated.