Greetings gentlemen

I swallowed the Pill in January and for a few months it really fucked me up. I was still a beta, trying to act Alpha. Life was shittier than before since I hadn't magically received the flood of pusst I expected. I went on a holiday for two months, and my perspective on many things changed. I could rekax and I had a lot of time for inward thought, and I slowly thought about pussy less and less.

I returned in July and since then I haven't been attracted to any girls. To me they are pointless to bother with, and instead I have been focussing on reading a lot of RP books and working on my Brasilian Jiu Jitsu as well as going to the gym. I am not perfect, far from where I want to be.

Sometimes I look around and see couples, and my mind automatically processes them. I see guys carrying handbags or pestering girls for attention, and I pity them. I see guys who seem alpha, and their girl just looks at them in a totally diffrent way, and I think to myself I want that. It may be helpful to mention I have been in two relationships, both of which I have been cheated on. I have yet to kiss a girl. Beta friends have gotten girls, and in my deepest darkest moments I've been fucking pissed and bitter at that fact.

Anyway, I digress. At my bjj, I see a girl sometimes. I've seen her look at me a few times, but she is really friendly so I put it down to that. I don't know why, but when we have eye contact, I get an adrenaline rush. At the end of every class, we must all shake hands and thank everyone personally, and when her and I shake hands, sometimes it feels like the eye contact is there for a fraction of a second longer than it has to be I haven't spoken to her at all apart from that. I am 18 and I think she is a few years older.

Is this oneitis? Reading back, especially the eye contact parts, it feels very blue pillesque. I don't understand how I can catch oneitis for a girl just from looks. What do I do? How do I escape the poison of oneitis, which I haven't felt for over a year?

Thank you