TRP and Confrontation

pag_el · 2015-04-24T18:14:42+00:00

Personally I would've confronted him and pushed him away, however I am not saying that would be the best course of action. I'm just naturally aggressive and a bigger guy and I would never accept any kind of disrespect like that from anyone.

LandShark805 · 2015-04-24T18:59:07+00:00

Calling lady bitch didn't help, calling her rude or assaultive or hostile would've. It gave an anchor for other to feel wronged over.

Mockery. Yes there is a risk of assault but maintain frame by being verbally superior.

"Yes I'm a bitch, thanks for asking" and turn around.

Slightly more confrontational, "hey we have a white knight here. Hey knight, where's your sword? Is that a dagger in your pocket or are you happy to see me?. Then eye stare, and turn.

In a bar fights, the most important thing is to stay on your feet, so think ankle sweep if he gets aggressive. After that, dismiss him as "damn, he's hammered".

Edit: removed fart gag, stayed serious.

favours_of_the_moon · 2015-04-24T20:05:57+00:00

Sounds like you handled it well.

People understand that the douchebag is the one who is being an asshole, most of the time. It's not like he was trying to make it seem like you had done something horrible and he had to white knight you. I mean, calling someone a bitch? Big deal.

cray-cray-cray · 2015-04-24T21:59:43+00:00

I tell her to relax and to stop trying to be a bitch.

trolololol That is exactly what a bitch doesn't want to hear.

Thought all conflict was avoided.

lol. You're lucky it wasn't the bitch and the white knight coming after you together.

But really, your reaction to the girl is what caused it all. Once it looks like a physical fight, you better bail either way unless something is preventing it.

vandaalen · 2015-04-24T19:17:35+00:00

Handled decently. Don't fight unless you inevitably have to, which means that your own or another person's health or even life are at risk and even then only use it to be able to eliminate the danger and/or escape the scene. Fighting over your ego as a replacement for a dick measuring contest isn't worth it.

There are several risks involved in street fights:

You do not know your opponent's capabilities compared to yours
You do not know your opponent's state of sanity
You do not know your opponent's pocktet contents
You do not know how many of your opponent's friends are there
You do not know your opponent's relationship to the owner or the bouncers
You do not know how bystanders are going to react
You do not know how police is going to react if they are called to the scene
You do not know if you might unwillingly harm your opponent more than you want to, resulting in serious injusries or even his death.

And the risk/reward ration just sucks. You gain nothing from winning a fight other than satisfaction of ego.

As always in these kind of threads I highly encourage people to learn how to fight in order to be able to avoid having to fight. I do MMA, which I can heavily recommend since it involves full contact sparring.

If you want to learn something even more applicable to streetfights, go with something which doesn't care about rules, like Krav Maga or JKD. although they usually do not do full contact.

Personally I pay a beer for idiots like this and asure them that they succeeded in intimidating me and I give them the chance to pull out from the situation without loosing their face.

However I will never let anybody who is showing agressive behaviour leave comfort distance and come closer than striking distance, either by steping back and creating space, or even by lightly pushing him if I cannot avoid it.

Next time also hold yourself from talking like that about that cunt in public. You also do not get anything from it, other than satisfying your ego.

goatcheese26 · 2015-04-24T19:23:37+00:00

All very solid responses guys I appreciate it.

Which kind of leads me to another point. I am so worried about how I look in front of other people (especially if I lost the fight) then I am of the actual fight itself.

spoetnick · 2015-04-24T19:02:55+00:00

A dude looking for drama for the sake of getting some drama is a Beta boy. He's trying to validate himself. You stood up for yourself against a chick, denying her pussy pass. He's trying to be the SJW/white knight, hopefully gaining some respect by trying to get you to submit to his social structure.

So he's a beta boy, beta's should be dealt with in the same way as chicks. You agree and amplify with humor, or amused mastery. Try to diffuse the situation. Try to make him look like a fool without giving him a obvious reason to actually assault you.

A friend of mine usually does this. Someone gets in his face, he keeps smiling but doesn't back down. After things start to heat up he tells the guy to 'wait here for a second, I'll be right back!'. He then goes to the bar, gets two beers and stays away for at least 5 minutes. After he gets back he gives one of the beers to the other guy who had some time to calm down while just standing around waiting for the guy that just walked away. Not everyone accepts the beer, but trying to fight a guy that just bought you a beer is a dick move, and hitting someone with a beer in both his hands is equally foul. After the beer is given he usually asks what the real problem is, sometimes he even introduces himself. This usually takes all the initial anger and frustration away, ending the entire situation.

The point is, you have to stand above it. By engaging him on his level and entering his frame, you are submitting. You are telling him you see him as an equal or your superior.

For me fighting is a last resort and if I do, I'll try to make damn sure I come out on top. I won't push him, I won't get in his face. I'll just hit him where it hurts with everything I have and be done with it.

Title	TRP and Confrontation
Author	goatcheese26
Upvotes	2
Comments	8
Date	April 24, 2015 5:21 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/33qd7l/trp_and_confrontation/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/trp-and-confrontation.148280 https://theredarchive.com/post/148280

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