I don't think I'm bringing any value to the sub by posting this so i apologise in advance, but honestly, I want some advice that isnt suger coated and just straight uo truth.

Let me start off by saying, I think im depressed. Actually im definitely depressed but i dont show in real life, i hide that shit and leave all the thinking till i lay in bed at night and then it spirals.

Im still very young (21 years old) so this is all probably over magnified in my head, maybe because of the depression or maybe because i was a spoiled brat when i was young.

Anyways, 2 years ago, my dad got sick and had to stop work and in turn couldn't send me any more money for my living expenses amd this all happened suddenly back when i wasnt working or anything and so i had to find some work, which took about 2 months. In that short period i lived on an Amazon Credit Card accumulating over 2000€ of debt within two months. Two years later and now all that debt is around €10k, but spread around two credit cards and a student loan that i got 4 months ago. Thats what i think is my biggest issue. Im scared shitless of that amount of debt, even though i see some people finish university with 50-60k debt and sometimes more. But it still keeps me up at night that i owe people a shit ton of money. Im still young, i know, but i dont know if im that young anymore. I still need one more semester to finish my bachelor's and then i want to go do my Master's. This is all being financed by debt. I make minimum wage so im always short every month.

Between all that and my dad's situation and the constant worrying about how my family is living in my shitty 4th world country, I don't really know how to handle all of this mentally. I want to get into stoicism more but i dont know which books to start with. So far i have Meditations by Marcus Aurelius on the top of my list but i havent gotten around to reading it yet.

Can any of you offer some advice guys? Thanks in advance boys.