Hey guys,

I've read a lot here about game, being aggressive, trying/not trying, being aloof, etc. but I've struggled with finding the balance. I've never had success at clubs (I'm 22, 5'6", around 20% bf, not a stat line for bar/club scene) so I tend to go towards day game or meeting people through my social circle. But even in more relaxed settings, there's a fine line and I'm having a tough time finding it.

Now I've seen the posts about not trying to attract women will attract them and trying to hard won't, but I don't have the physical attraction to pull on aloofness and indifference alone (I've lifted for 4 years but I'm still short with no visible abs at the moment). I have to make moves. But when I do, I still don't get anywhere. I either end up friend-zoned or I creep them out. So how aggressive is too aggressive? And when is it too soft? I can read the social interaction well but I only really see when I lay it on too soft or too hard, and my indifference/aloofness typically ends with her just going to another friend or someone else. I know each person is different but there's gotta be a general sweet spot for it.