~ archived since 2018 ~

Could use some advice in dealing with this shit

March 31, 2022

It's been a while. I've tried to handle it on my own and at this point I need some advice. I can't help but keep reminiscing about how the last girl I was with "won", and how they "win" all the time. I broke frame, got angry, and she walked out. I understand now how important having a mission is, but this shit has been urking me for the past couple of weeks.

I've read the sidebar, have a couple hobbies, lift 6x a week, and have even started cold approaching for the first time in my life, but as soon as the day ends and I'm about to head to bed, the thoughts start creeping up again.

I've read on stoicism, "if I let it affect me, it will" but it's really not that easy. I've tried so much shit. I understand that I am in the anger phase now. The thought of fucking another girl angers me because of how easy they have it. They can switch their emotions off in a second and find another dude in that same second. Blah blah blah, life is unfair. I'm doing what I can to build a dope ass life.

How do you handle this shit? The failures? How easy girls have it? How much shit just gets handed to them? Shit makes me feel like being a man isn't as rewarding sometimes. I always keep thinking "if only I did this, I could've put her in her place." Shit like that, again I understand that I am angry. Typing this out has helped already. Could use some advice.

TheRedArchive is an archive of Red Pill content, including various subreddits and blogs. This post has been archived from the subreddit /r/newTRP.

/r/newTRP archive

Download the post

Want to save the post for offline use on your device? Choose one of the download options below:

Post Information
Title Could use some advice in dealing with this shit
Author St31nway
Upvotes 6
Comments 7
Date March 31, 2022 7:54 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit /r/newTRP
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/newTRP/could-use-some-advice-in-dealing-with-this-shit.1109234
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/newTRP/comments/tt85x6/could_use_some_advice_in_dealing_with_this_shit/
Red Pill terms in post

[–]themostgianthorse 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

This is normal.

You made a few comparisons to men and women in this post. This is mostly a waste of time because men and women are different. We have wildly different experiences especially when it comes to relationships and sex. Men will spend most of their time initiating while women will spend most of their time filtering.

We have different advantages and challenges. True, even mildly attractive women will have an easier time getting sex but they don’t value it the same way we do. What happens to a product when it becomes wildly available? It loses value. If you don’t believe me, ask your toothbrush. But for most women, this will fade. The pretty girl pours at the bar stop, only 32 “likes” instead of the previous 582.

Thank your lucky god damn stars that you are a man and your ability to attract and arouse the opposite sex does not come solely from your appearance.

Men and women are different. Physically, psychologically, socially, etc. Keep this in mind as you work through your anger phase. It’ll pass assuming you continue with your focus on self.

[–]St31nway[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This makes sense. For some reason I thought women value sex as much as men do. I think this might be where the anger is stemming from. Their ability to get what is so scarce to me seems unfair in that they are born into abundance of it. I’ll keep at it.

Appreciate the response man

[–]hltr78 3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Just let it go man, he who cares least wins

[–]St31nway[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Gotcha man 👍🏻

[–]MountainousFog 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Your feelings are perfectly normal and natural. I recommend 15 minutes of meditation per day. Read the comments of this post and it will help a lot:


[–]Don_Draper27 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I had this happen for a few weeks when my daughters mother ended things with me.

I'd feel anxious when I woke up and anxious when going to sleep. I'd meditate twice a day, journal numerous times a day, and was even going to the gym twice a day to distract myself.

A week after the breakup, I had a mild panic attack when I saw her on bumble. I had to call a buddy and he walked me through deep breathing and listened to my rant. I immediately went to the gym to hit 1RM sets on my squat.

It did help when I developed plates. They were a good distraction and confidence booster, although I was reading through some old journal entries yesterday and I saw that I was still feeling anxiety over my ex.

Eventually it did just go away. I stopped missing her, I stopped GAF about if she was seeing anyone.

It was the first time that I'd been broken up with, and I don't think I handled it well. I see now that I had ego and possessive issues.

Your anger phase is another issue. Read the rational male and way of the superior man. Woman do get sex extremely easier, but men will gain a much higher sense of success from it every single time. This is the game. Learn the game and learn how to play it.

[–]St31nway[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Hey man. Thanks for the response. I’ve read the rational male (although it was about half a year ago), the sidebar, and about a handful of other books. My current problem is my lack of action. I get IOIs throughout my day but can never seem to act on them. I use them as ego boosts and mental masturbation.

I also don’t have a social circle, which I am currently trying to create. As far as the situation with the girl it is getting better. I can sleep consistently now at least.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2023. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter