[18M] Feeling lost

Kenic_In_MD · 2017-08-11T17:34:24+00:00

for college I will move to one of the biggest 3 cities in the country, but I have to wait one more year.

If you truly have these limitations that you listed then find way to improve yourself. Do you have any skills or hobbies that you are good at? Are you good with public speaking? You hitting the gym? You have a car? How much money do you have in the bank to party with? If you are truly limited in approaching girls for a whole nother' year then work on improving yourself so when you do go to college you are ready to hit the ground running.

Do things you enjoy too, it will help you get your mentality out of a rut.

2017-08-11T21:12:07+00:00

I'd advise against doing direct cold approaches (direct intentions), but rather practicing approaching in a more indirect manner, and focusing on building a circle of acquaintances, and later, friends (after all, PUA doesn't seem to be your primary goal at the moment). The concept is basically the same as that of PUA-approaching; most people love talking about themselves. It's certainly enough to just say "hey, I noticed you quite a few times now but we've never chatted, have we?"

There's no reason not to practice socializing in your town. Most old friends you might have are happy to meet for a coffee and talk about the good old times. Other than that, use meetup.com, or social activities in general that interest you. I know it's pretty difficult to start at 0, but getting used to talking to strangers (old lady in the queue, taxi driver, barista, whatever) will be a very valuable base skill you can use further down the road for PUA and social networking etc.

NoFap and StopGaming are already immensely important cornerstones for all further self-development; I'd add meditation as third and final pillar (along with cold showers and 1-2 types of sports you enjoy and do regularly).

I was 17 when I started with self-development; and while I know the outlook is kind of grim at times and it's not always easy, it's well worth the effort.

ZayumBayum835 · 2017-08-11T18:54:06+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Radicalmattitude1 · 2017-08-11T21:38:57+00:00

Look up the concept of "abundance mentality". A very simple definition of it is: an intrinsic belief system that manifests itself extrinsically where your physical, social and psychospiritual needs are more than adequately met.

It sounds hokey I know, but it is extremely powerful in the context of game and social interaction. Basically, once you believe that you have more than enough friends/women / social status in your life, you will attract these things into your real life more and more.

There is a lot to this concept but a really good place to start is showing gratitude for all the good things that you have right now.

confused_at_30 · 2017-08-11T21:41:48+00:00

Meh. You're young. I was a real late bloomer and lost my virginity at 21 (started as uber nerd). Now I do pretty decent with women. What I'm saying is, eh, there's no rush at 18, although obviously you're constantly horny.

Some ideas:

Find single friends, just for hanging out. Although if the gf guys will hang out/ go out to bars (I don't see why not) - that's perfectly fine, too. I personally never got the 'wingman' thing and chase women solo, so whoever is willing to have fun.
You COULD take the angle that since you're getting out of bumblefuck in a year's time, maybe you should "burn it down" with the girls, or carefully hit on chicks. Why not. Then again I've never lived in a small town, so eh. Is there a neighboring town you can hit up via Tinder location or whatever?
Find hobbies, new hobbies. That's how to meet people socially, and sometimes girls. Try community theater, regular theater (shitload of girls), improv, maybe start a sketch group. Local coed sports leagues, meetup.com, whatevs.
Since you're moving next year, it's perfectly fine just to dive head-first into academics/ self-improvement/ the gym/ programming/ business/ whatever, and put girls on the backburner. Still, might be good to get some more momentum going -- me personally? 11 years later, I'm not really good friends with anyone from my (3,000 student) high school, except my brother. I just went to my 10 year reunion last fall, and I like a dozen of those guys are so, but nothing super close. And I don't care. Socially, my "senior year" didn't mean jack shit long term. If I could go back, I would have tried to bulk up in the gym even faster, dressed like a huge douchebag (taken huge risks), taken BJJ earlier (basically shed my nerd identity) ... and tried to fuck the blonde sluts. Back when I was 18, I thought "social classes" were locked in stone. LOL. It's basically 95% perception and maybe 5% reality. So many missed slut opportunities.

Hindsight is 20/20 though.

Yeah definitely learn the programming now, self-improvement pays off MUCH more the earlier you start, with anything.

OleDeadwoodDick · 2017-08-12T10:43:44+00:00

You are 18 you are fine. I would not worry about anything at this point especially women. You have plenty of time. It gets easier to pick up as you become older and settle more into yourself as a man. Right now you are just a kid and unsure of yourself. You need to build yourself before you can build your game. Lift weights, educate yourself, acquire a skill, and stack cash.

legiz · 2017-08-11T17:34:36+00:00

You're young. Be patient

2017-08-12T02:19:36+00:00

Hit the gym and do some running too. And forget the no fap stuff. Sometimes you need to to get the edge off.

Title	[18M] Feeling lost
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	13
Comments	12
Date	August 11, 2017 5:25 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/6t2o6h/18m_feeling_lost/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/18m-feeling-lost.1431857 https://theredarchive.com/post/1431857

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