I just thought of the analogy that a guy and a girl trying to score with each other is a lot like 1 team 2 player game of basket ball. Essentially the guy and the girl are on the same team but they need get the ball in the hoop on the other side of the court. In order to do so they both need to dribble the ball to each other as they go down.

 

If either one does not not dribble / pass back the ball then it will just sit where it is. Otherwise if one doesn't have the skill then the same thing will happen. Or if one goes half way down the court with the other but then just wants to stay / get stuck "playing the game" there then neither will score.

 

Also the idea of blaming yourself or the other isn't always right, you're both really trying keep in control of something that is external to both of you, normally the fault is where an accidental bad pass leaves the ball flying down the court. Also blaming the other / yourself for how things are progressing you have to keep in mind it's a back in forth, your send back is the prep for their send back. Would you prep the other for a bad ally-oop and then blame them other f'ing it up and the ball going down the court instead of scoring? (not saying you should "blame" yourself either, just get the ball back picked up, get her ready for the shot and prep her for the ally-oop)