Dealing with regret

CocoBabeNYC · 2022-07-31T13:56:14+00:00

You are shooting yourself in the foot by having expectations of how interactions should go. When your expectations don't match reality, you feel disappointed wjth yourself.

Matt_Bigmonster · 2022-07-31T14:25:04+00:00

Would you be angry at 10 year old timmy for burning dinner at his first try? No, because he is doing his best and learning. Whwn he is 17 he will seduce many women with his cooking.

Forget your perfectionism and enjoy the process of learning. You did your best with the knowledge you had at that time.

P7o7s7t7a7l · 2022-07-31T15:58:09+00:00

Keep it in perspective. There are other things that weigh on my mind more so than going out and meeting women.

Meeting women isn't really a life skill that's going to guide you through tougher decisions as you get older. It's just social skills that afford more opportunity.

The regret is not leaving a negative situation sooner. The feeling I've wasted my time with negative people. It's a learning experience, and I learn what to avoid and how to overcome it. There's nothing wrong with being alone if all that surrounds you is outwardly hostile or negative. Regret stems from involving myself in these scenarios. It's better if it was avoided.

Sweaty_Literature_69 · 2022-07-31T21:41:40+00:00

I don't have regrets about being rejected. I get pain, sometimes shame, and a very intense feeling of attention to myself and all that is wrong with me, but no regrets.

I only get regrets when I DON'T talk to girls i like. Which is why I try and think " I'd rather be rejected than be a coward" whenever I'm feeling anxious about an approach.

Dealing with rejection though:

Have no expectations. All you should be trying to do is project yourself and your sexuality honestly. If you're going in with a specific "endgame" in mind, you're shooting yoursef in the foot. Express yourself as honestly as you can and see what comes of it. Do not be emotionally invested in the girls you approach.
Realise you are not perfect, and shouldn't be. Not only is this a learning process that requires time and effort before you become good at it, but you will also never be perfect at it. Humans are not perfect, we all have imperfections and issues and different capabilities. Why would you be perfect? Why would you NOT fuck it up sometimes? It is a miracle to get it just right occasionally, not the other way around. Once you realise this you can focus on simply expressing yourself honestly and accepting that you trying to constantly find ways to filter your faults or weaknesses to the outside world is not only a waste of effort but also counterproductive. It literally turns women off and saps all life out of you. Accept yourself and be confident about who you are.
Understand that everyone has all sorts of things going. Including the girls you approach. Abusive backgrounds, difficult upbringings, neglectful parents, toxic shame, fundamental religious beliefs, insecurities, a bad day, a bad week, a bad ex-boyfriend, a recent breakup, the list goes on and on. Rejection is not always about you. You could easily go a whole month of being rejected with none of them being about you. Understand that life is a multitude of things and rejection is an inevitable part of the sexual game.
If you kick a sandbag enough times, your leg stops hurting. Throw yourself against the rocks time and time again, bear the pain initially and soon you will be numb to it. This is when game gets really interesting too, as that is the point where you lose all inhibition to honest expression of self. If you can get here, you will be unstoppable.

koseabjitt · 2022-07-31T13:57:20+00:00

I only feel regret if i see a girl who is hot in my opinion OR looks like she's willing to bang & i don't say hi.

aside from that i have no regrets in dating at all . and how do i deal with the regret of not saying hi enough times is by saying hi more the next day.

kanonas-cambria_tw16 · 2022-07-31T20:21:32+00:00

I regret things that go well, when I feel like I could have done even better but missed an opportunity. If I act too confident, I regret it. If I'm too conservative, I regret not being confident enough.

Title	Dealing with regret
Author	Emortalrat
Upvotes	3
Comments	7
Date	July 31, 2022 1:08 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/wcocib/dealing_with_regret/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/dealing-with-regret.1253171 https://theredarchive.com/post/1253171

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