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[–]ProfessionalAffect90 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (18 children) | Copy Link
You for sure could have seen this girl. Next time I would make definitive plans a few days before the actual supposed weekend you’d hang. Example time place etc. you can confirm the date a day before with a funny text like don’t forget to wear something cute tomorrow ;) works well for me.
Secondly your texting ( ah this isn’t working out) minutes after ….? comes off as very needy and butt hurt.
She is not totally sold on hanging out with you at that point. She’s weighing her options. Now if that bothers you and your not okay with that it’s fine to feel that way.
But if you wanted to potentially see her you could have just left it at …? For a few days. and if she didn’t respond which she might have you could have rescheduled for another time.
You have more invested than she does and it showed in your texting when you sent that last message.
[–]CardPlayerKings 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (17 children) | Copy Link
Hey man thanks for the reply.
Yes the text "Ah this isnt working out" wasn't ideally timed for game purposes. However after sending the "?" text I started feeling strongly about blowing her off and actually didnt even want her to respond at that point so I rushed it.
I think overall though the text should hit her pretty hard as I doubt many guys have done that to her. My guess is shes kicking herself today.
[–]ProfessionalAffect90 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
I’ll give you the truth not trying to be mean. Being outcome independent sends a much stronger message than this isn’t working out.
Silence says a lot more then being upset about her not responding to your message in a timely fashion. It says I have other stuff going on in my life it’s doesn’t matter to me if we hang out or not.
Really you didn’t want to see her? If she responded and said hey yes let go to xyz bar can you honestly say you wouldn’t have gone…
Don’t hold your breath. Even average looking women have 5x options as attractive men. She is not kicking her self bud. You did what every other guy is doing and that’s being needy. I always tell my friends when they meet a girl at a bar she’s checking if your going to be needy or creepy first and foremost. Girls want to meet cool guys don’t be those two things mentioned and your success will skyrocket.
[–]CardPlayerKings 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago* (9 children) | Copy Link
I can honestly say I wasn't going out to the bar if she messaged me. My house was a total mess I hadnt cleaned it and wasnt going to at that point. I only would have cleaned it if she messaged me earlier in the day.
I agree being silent would give me a chance at seeing her again. But that wasnt what I was going for here. I had decided that It would be more satisfying/relieving to blow her out. She was taking up too much mental space and I didnt want to deal with it anymore.
And I think youre wrong about every guy blowing her off like I did. I dont think thats common and I doubt she was expecting it(hence she wrote back quickly) I think the common response of guys in that situation is to chase her forever. Very rare would a guy move on her from her for so little. Maybe it came off a little butthurt but at the end of the day I still moved on from her for a relatively small amount of game playing which is kinda boss imo.
Also girls do "kick themselves" and have regret about fucking up. Thats why after you gost a girl they might text you out of the blue a few weeks later.
[–]ProfessionalAffect90 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
Just want to preface I have been doing this a long time I’ve seen every text message sequence from here to the moon. My whole life is around seduction and game. All my friends are in the industry and some of the best coaches out. I’ve helped coach camps all kinds of things.
It’s not about blowing her off. It’s about your sub communication of being butt hurt thus coming off as needy. She responded so quickly cause she’s thinking to herself yep dodged a bullet with this guy. Which is fine I’ve made every mistake out there.
Look I’m also all for women who are enthusiastic to meet me. But I also hate this notion of chase forever. If your sitting around all day waiting for her to respond and obsessed yes thats chasing.
It takes 2 seconds to write a text message and set up a date. Even if you have send 15 texts over the course of a month before you actually get her out thats 2 minutes worth of your time.
You would not believe how many times I’ve gotten with girls who you thought would never agree to come out only to hit me up weeks later to say hey what are you up too. I’ve dated some of these girls long term even.
[–][deleted] 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
[–]ProfessionalAffect90 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I would have left it at …? And waited a few days I bet she would have responded. If not I would have sent a funny meme about waiting for a response.
Send this message now and see what happens I’ve seen it work from digging people back out of worse holes. It would have worked better to text this like an hour after she wrote that but you have nothing to lose anymore.
still love you though…
Could re ignite a convo let me know how it goes. If it does , vibe a little then go right back to making plans to meet
Good luck
[–]CardPlayerKings 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago* (5 children) | Copy Link
I missed this part "It’s not about blowing her off. It’s about your sub communication of being butt hurt thus coming off as needy."
Yeah I agree. Like I said the timing of the text wasn't ideal. But again I didn't care at that point. My main goal was to get my text in before she could respond. I had a shift in where I wanted to go in the interaction.
Also i believe you are reading her reaction wrong. She said "Im sorry to hear that"...To me she is trying to show that she didnt want this result. She is giving a subtle hint that she wants me to change my mind. Im not picking up the vibe that thinks she "dodged a bullet"
[–]ProfessionalAffect90 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
You didn’t care…. But you cared enough/ more than her even to send a text message that said this isn’t working out sorry cause she wasn’t responding and playing hard to get. You say she’s taking up mental space in your head also. You need to ask yourself why a random girl you met at a casino is taking up mental space in your brain. The rabbit hole goes deep my friend. I’ve been through all this before. Take my word.
Bingo! she didn’t want this result. You hit it on the head with that one. You know why that is? She wanted you to not be needy and you did not succeed man.
[–]CardPlayerKings 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I didn't care that the timing wasn't ideal and might look butthurt. I never said I didn't care about it working out with the girl. (dont strawman me)
Im self aware and I know why the girl is occupying my mind. Its because Im in scarcity right now and also have nothing else going on in my life and on top of that I live alone far away from family and friends. I cant fix that immediately. Ive been in the game a long time too fwiw
[–]CardPlayerKings 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
"Bingo! she didn’t want this result. You hit it on the head with that one. You know why that is? She wanted you to not be needy and you did not succeed man."
Thats one interpretation. But I dont think she would write that to a guy who just killed her attraction. Its a little too inviting imo
[–]ProfessionalAffect90 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Not trying to strawman. Sounds like you wanted it to work out with the girl. But Not at the cost of her playing hard to get or being hot and cold etc. which is perfectly reasonable.
My advice I believe would have gave you a better chance to at least meet up with her. But it sounds like you have to make a choice between whether your okay entertaining not so interested women or not.
Yep thank you.
And thanks for the discussion, I enjoyed it.
[–]TheSunshineMan 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Yes the text "Ah this isnt working out" wasn't ideally timed for game purposes.
That's not gamey.. that's a super beta but hurt type of response..
[–]CardPlayerKings 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Telling a girl its not working out is always butthurt? Wtf is going on here. Im about to delete this thread
[–]TheSunshineMan 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
The way you said it, when you said it, yes that's correct.
That's the type of text that will make a girl never want to see you again.
[–]CardPlayerKings 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Thats why I said it wasnt for game purposes. It was genuinely to end it.
Do you think when a girl is treating you poorly you should draw a boundary with her? Or you believe you should pretend you don't care? Just curious what your view is generally. Disregard my interaction with the girl
[–]TheSunshineMan 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Goal: Accomplished
[–]confidence_man91 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
After “seeing you” She was waiting for you to text her with more solid plans
This was a misunderstanding that blew out of proportion
[–]CardPlayerKings -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Could be. Pretty ridiculous even still imo
[–]confidence_man91 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Some girls have bad girl-game just like guys
[–]mrdudeman47 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
she saw you didn’t message back thursday, assumed you were busy. wanted to make her seem busy the next day to even out the energy. then you proceeded to text her 3 times in a row the same day LMAO. she’s probably so happy she dodged a bullet… after everything people say on this sub why would you randomly go off with some max desperation energy my god
Well the question mark text is an appropriate "double text" as her behaviour is extremely strange considering shes the one apparantly organizing this whole meet up. And the third text was just me being over it obviously not meant to be a seductive gamey msg.
[–]mrdudeman47 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
alphas don’t need to care about that. she doesn’t want someone who is planning his entire week around her. ew
[–]CardPlayerKings 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Planning a whole week around her? It was a meeting on friday night. That she planned a week prior and is now hitting me up to confirm/organize further. Shes literally chasing me the whole time organizing the entire thing then goes silent on the day.
Even when we first met a week ago she asked for my number and it was her idea to meet the next friday...And she even text me first the next day and confirmed meeting on friday again. So I dont know what youre referring too with this "Planning my entire week" talk
[–]mrdudeman47 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
that’s what it seems like when you text her 3 times in one day. maybe she was busy that day? holy desperate
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